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kanmom51 · 4 months ago

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Jikook car drive to CT

I think that before I dive into the actual car ride I have to set a few things straight.

Did you guys notice they chose to ride together? Shock and awe...

Lmao.

Just a little stab for all those who were nitpicking at them back in 2021-23. Yeah, you's that were all about "but they don't ride in the same car anymore", or "they aren't addressing each other or reacting to each other on SM", or whatever other kind of insecurity for some or just outright malice from others.

JM and JK are the same JM and JK they were before the hiatus and solo paths. Same same. With adjustments having to be made to a new reality of not spending close to 24/7 together. Adjusting to their crazy busy solo work and schedules. Adjusting to learning how to be alone when you are used to not being, because your significant other is submerged in his work while you are not. With adjustments to not having ot7 as their protecting glass closet. When you are used to being together close to 24/7 and circumstances change and you can't anymore, as a couple you need to adjust to that new reality and sometimes it's harder on one of you than the other. Not because you don't love each other or need each other equally, but because you are different people and adjust differently to this new reality.

And in the reality of these 2 young men, well it has been apparent since the beginning of 2023 that JK was the one that was struggling most with these changes. I'd say that this is can be a huge clue to his neurodivergence.

When we look at these two young men, whom I believe to be 2 queer young men in a long term loving relationship, not only do we need to look at them within the context of them being in one of the biggest if not THE biggest band in the world right now, living in a still mostly homophobic society and at the time were looking at enlisting for their 18 month military service, a military that still outlaws sexual relations between men.

This has to be understood while looking at Jikook throughout the years and in 2021-2023, things changing after creation of Hybe, going public, trying to buy out SM and the whole saga with MHJ (which was going on since Oct 2022 behind the scenes).

That's a good starting point understanding them in 2023 and going into watching Are you sure?

But that's not all.

There's more.

Seeing some of the reactions, comments, posts I feel the need to say this as well:

JM and JK are human beings.

They aren't characters in a drama.

This isn't The Bold and the Beautiful, JK not Ridge and JM not Brooke or vise versa (seriously, just picked the parallels because of the current hair colours). They weren't married and divorced ending up with others and then married again and divorced and with others and just going on and on and on. Ups and downs, ins and outs, together and parted. This is real life, not a TV show. Not only would their love not last that (and they clearly love each other), their interactions, their dynamics wouldn't just stay the same same. Not to mention what it would have done to the band and their own relationships with the others. They wouldn't survive it nor would the band. So don't create drama where there isn't is what I say.

What I see is a pretty much levelled long term couple. With relationship bumps in the road, adjustments, frustrations, moods.

I also see 2 queer young men who due to the reality of 2023 have close to zero camera time in one frame. And it shows.

But mainly I see LOTS AND LOTS OF LOVE FOR EACH OTHER.

On top of that I see both of them feeling physically unwell. Poor JM with his stomach issues and bursting pipe (yes I just said that, lol), and JK who has been ill for days, had to go to the hospital for treatment before his solo debut performance, for that performance to be fucked up by the weather. Man was definitley still unwell the whole time constantly sniffling and coughing. And JM worrying about JK's health is another indicator as to it not being nothing.

Bottom line: these are real life people with their own different characteristics, feelings, stress, anxiety, illnesses and the runs.

Not that they didn't know there will be cameras, they were well aware of it, but looks like JM was initially a little shocked to see just how many of them.

Even with the cameras and initial apparent awkwardness, not with each other, but with the whole "it's just the two of us on camera together, no other members to buffer", they are at ease with each other, smiling and giggling.

And even with the cameras and that on one hand need to say things but on the other need to still be wary of what you say and not to say too much - something they are expert at, even if it's been a while and takes them a bit to get back on the wagon with. Even with that they go back to that very jikooky type of formal - informal interaction with each other, JK 'forgetting' JM is the hyung out of the two (like I said, same same).

We have JM's cheeky comment about spooning JK if he's cold, one he insisted on implementing that same night. Mics on, cameras obviously on, but us not allowed to see a thing (and I will talk about this in another post - the whole "if there's nothing to hide how come we didn't get to see one of the apparently funniest moments of the trip, one that the the two and those around them couldn't shut up about?" (phew, that was a long question).

We also get a cute JM looking out for JK's health turning on the heat in the car, turning on his seat heater (without JK knowing about it, lol).

As a whole, those two in the car sounded like an old married couple. I was watching laughing the whole time, the whole thing feeling too familiar, lol.

But I know what you are all waiting for.

More so those that love to question their relationship.

Let's get on and discuss the car convo some are stressing over.

This:

tumblr

But wait.

Before I talk about it, there's one more word I want to mention.

CONTEXT.

Context is EVERYTHING.

We all know that, right?

And what is the important context here?

Well, first of, this is all in front of the cameras.

Secondly, we ALL KNOW that even with their crazy schedules JM and JK DID GET TO SEE EACH OTHER in those months counting up to this trip, in private, just the two of them.

We know from them that they were together drinking the night before Hobi's enlistment, for example. We know JM was at JK's before JM left for London end of May, JK 'complaining' about having to change the way JM adjusted the mood lamp. We know they are the closest duo in the group, but beyond that, those two are just super close. We know that JK went live basically every time JM left for overseas and was overjoyed when JM showed up in his comments (including his comments during the mukbang live and perhaps coming over after he finished his schedule). This is before this trip. Let's not mention (or maybe let's) the flirt-fest we got in the JK in bed live that came shortly after this trip.

One other huge thing we seem to forget is that:

This is an edited product we are seeing.

Not a live discussion.

And even if it looks like the conversation is somewhat flowing, when you look really closely you see that there are cuts cuts cuts. Some might just be change of camera angle, others are real cuts where you can see that whatever was said was not said at the same time as a flowing conversation.

So, if you look carefully you will see that the first part of the discussion and the part where JM brings up V are not exactly in one flow. That there is a cut between what JK says, and we will get to that, don't fret, and when JM brings up him facetiming with V and what follows.

The start of it is also not clear. If what JM says about not going somewhere together in a while is the start of the flow of conversation, then the clip they are showing us of them in the car driving in the streets of NY is not connected to that, because the conversation continues when they are already out of town. 2 possibilities here. Either that was the start of the convo and for some reason they decided to show the car driving in NY even though the convo happened with them out of the city already. Or, once again, my point that maybe the convo isn't in one flow - even that first part of it. That JM did say what he said when they were still in the city and then their conversation following was edited in a way that we didn't get much of it until they were already out of the city and JK says what he says.

Reason I bring this up is again to emphasize the fact that as much as we are let in, we are still getting an edited product.

You know, same edited product that cuts out their flirty playful bedtime toothbrushing session.

I also want to bring this up, because I basically agree with much of what @shellbells-things the importance of them needing that getaway together (in this post):

This was written with the official translations in mind.

But you see, this is not what JK said.

The actual translation is basically JK calling out JM for not seeking him out enough!!!

And we also have this from @haedalkoo (thanks you for this post💜):

And why does it matter? Why do these different translations matter? Because they tell us a totally different story.

In the first you have JK saying that when one of them is busy, even though the other is not, he does not tend to call/reach out to the one that is busy. Basically this could be read as them not making an effort to contact the other even when they had time on their hands to do so. And perhaps that is why there are people up in arms about this, although my take of it is that even if this was the correct translation, which it is not, that understanding, that conclusion, would have been a very superficial one, disregarding the context of those two, who they are, where they are and what they are doing, as mentioned above.

In the other, what seems to be the more accurate translation, we have a salty boyfriend complaining about his partner not reaching out to him when he's busy, but also not reaching out to him when JK is busy, even if JM is not as busy.

"Your busy you don't seek me out, your not busy you don't seek me out"...

Now let's look at what JK said within the context of it all.

This isn't about them not seeing each other, not being in touch at all. Being estranged. Losing contact. Like so many want it to be about, given that would be so much more dramatic and 'interesting'.

This is about it not being enough for JK.

Enough being the key word.

JM and JK are different. They are both highly driven, and when JK has a JM by his side, said JM is a catalyst and has JK as driven as him. But you see, they weren't together. JM, being the workaholic that he is, highly driven with his work, having to give not 100% but 1000%, could easily lose himself in that work. And as much as he loves JK, or perhaps even more so because he's crazy about him, he can't have him around as a distraction. So, in a sense, when he works he can get lost in that work and that leaves little "free" time to spend with the person he loves, the person that loves him, the person that needs him. Same person that was REALLY struggling at the start of 2023 while JM was too absent. Again, that does not mean that JM was not spending time with JK. It was just not enough. Especially while JK was sort of lost at that point in a sense that he had no clear path set for himself. JK is different in the sense that JM is kind of his blankie, his anchor, his safe place. He needs JM around even when he is up to nothing (see JM's "he comes to my room to lie on my bed and do nothing" from the LA live 2021). And having him around is a need. Do we remember crying JK at the end of his lives on White day 2023. Heart wrenching. And again, it's not that JM doesn't need JK, he does, but a. his need is different to JK's, and b. JM was super busy at the time while JK was doing basically nothing.

And when JK was busy, well I'm guessing that JM was giving him the space he thought JK needed to work. But obviously this wasn't what JK wanted.

This saltiness is all coming from the same person that says he doesn't answer his phone calls or reply to texts. The person that JM complained when he doesn't answer his calls. With all that he still needed JM to reach out. He needed to know that JM is thinking about him.

This conversation isn't about them not seeing each other. It's about not seeing each other enough. It's about JM not seeking JK out as much as JK needed him to. And it's about them not being able, for whichever reasons (exterior or self inflicted) to do exactly this. Be out and about together. The two of them. This is exactly what you do in a healthy long term relationship. You talk. You are open. You tell your partner how you feel and what you need.

And you know what JK sounded like to me?

He reminded me of this JK:

The JK that even though he had already scolded JM he couldn't just let it go. That even though JM apologized several times and explained himself, he just couldn't let it go because it was weighing on him, that choice that he felt JM made.

And I know, I just know, that this conversation we got in the car was not a one of. That "Your here. Finally" we got from him at the end...

He needed this to happen, for JM to make this happen.

I will also add, even though I cannot go into too much detail at this point, that I feel that the : "You're here. Finally", has so much more sub context to it within the way they had both handled 2022-23 and that adjustment to the new reality. Not about it being easier for one over the other, but more so about how they handled this "apartness" that was kind of forced on them.

Anyway, that "finally", that was it for me. Seeing. No. Feeling how this was weighing on JK. Feeling just how important this was for him. JM making that effort and showing up for him like he did.

I hope that I have managed to get the message through. I will drill it in with my three keywords to this post:

COUPLE

CONTEXT

ENOUGH

I will end this by saying this:

Read that convo as you will, see those two as you will. At the end of the day not only did they CHOOSE to do this again and again (even with the little time they still had with their crazy schedules and upcoming enlistment). Not only did JK say he wanted to keep going with this until they are 50 years old. But they also CHOSE to enlist together. To be TOGETHER for those 18 months of military service. CHOOSING to do so knowing that meant a harder service and placement.

At the end of the day they CHOSE EACH OTHER.

And they will keep on doing so!!!

#Jikook #Kookmin #Minkook #Jungkook #Jimin #JK #JM #Are you sure? Jikook

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yandere-kokeshi · 1 year ago

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Hey can i request platonic yandere 141 x reader who is touch starved but also uncomfortable being touched? They struggle because on one hand they want to snuggle into their big buff bodies but in the other hand because they hardly had any loving physical contactas a child, they just don't it strange?

— Yandere Platonic TF-141 x gn darling who's touchstarved but doesn't know how to ask and feels weird

Warnings: yandere behavior, and slight forced affection.

A/N: this is kinda bad, not happy with it. But I still hope you can enjoy, anon <3

It’s quite a funny thing, because all of them are touch-starved too.

While all of them — including Johnny — will try to respect your space and let you come to them naturally, sometimes they (Price and Soap) go overboard and bombard you with affection that may lead to you being overwhelmed.

Price, being a devious dog, often bodyguards you, especially in public; wherever you are, he’s standing right behind you, cracking up the air with bad-dad jokes or smoking his favorite cigar. Slowly but surely, John starts to roll his hand around your lower back; watching your reactions to ensure he’s not pushing. But, as soon as he sees you okay with it, he slides his hand up and around your shoulder, before pushing you against him. He sees you coil up, but within a few seconds, you relax and straighten up your shoulders; something that makes him smirk.

Soap is the definition of overbearing — he’s naturally touchy, patting you on the shoulder after a long time apart, tight hugs that end up with you begging for a break, and a tight hold on your hand everywhere. Let’s not forget about Johnny’s deep kisses on your temple. Whilst he knows you prefer not to be bombarded with touches, he can’t help himself– you’re jus’ so darn cute.

Sooner or later, you become comfortable with it. Even while you’re still flinching at his touch, you crave it like sweets. And it’s something he’s willing to push onto you, showing that as you need his touch.

Ghost and Gaz are quite calmer, not touching you unless you come to them; awaiting you to open up to them — but still demanding in their own way of affection.

Kyle often uses the excuse of ‘accidentally’ touching you, seeing where you are comfortable and how you react. He glides his hand over yours, watching if you either remove it, or simply let it stay. If you stay? He places his warm hand on top of yours, sooner interlocking his fingers between yours; and if you remove it? He lets it go, trying it again without making it too obvious. Of course, he apologizes, and you both laugh at it– but he

Simon rarely touches you. The kind where he flinches himself if you two accidentally touch, simply sitting by each other. It’s to the point where it’s almost uncomfortable, and forces you to get out of your comfort zone; asking if you can hold his hand, or hold pinkies, which he’ll gladly do.

Everyone quickly learns your body language, and it’s easy to read you by a few weeks — seeing when you want attention, need to be alone, what kind of touch you need, etc.

—

Masterlist || Reblogs, comments, and likes are very much appreciated!! Stay well!!

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befuddledcinnamonroll · 11 months ago

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Top 10 Things I Love About the QL Tumblr Community 2023

I'm loving everyone's end of year lists, and decided to make up one of my own.

I haven't been on Tumblr for very long and was originally just lurking. 2023 marks the year where I finally started posting, after I read a take that made me feel compelled to come to a fictional character's defense. (Saengtai, my poor little blorbo).

So in commemoration of my first proper year of active tumblring, I present what I love about this community (in no particular order).

(Side note - Technically I know this is still primarily a BL community, but I like to say QL because I am trying to manifest more lesbians for us.)

1) The Gifmakers

Y'all are a good 70% of the reason I joined Tumblr in the first place. There are so many show moments that I want to relive, but without having to search through videos. Sometimes I want to appreciate the aesthetics. Sometimes I want to remember adorable or goofy moments. Sometimes I just want to see cute boys eating each other's faces. Our gifmakers give all of that to us, with the addition of so much creativity and style.

There's too many amazing ones to mention everyone, but I have to shout out @sparklyeyedhimbo, because the way your brain works makes me so happy.

2) The expertise

The other part of why I joined Tumblr was to learn more about what BLs were out there and what I might be missing. And holy hell. Y'all are putting in the work. Not only lists and resources for finding all kinds of QLs, like these fabulous monthly breakdowns by @gunsatthaphan, but also amazing posts that add additional context, like @absolutebl's incredibly helpful breakdown of Asian honorifics. There is so much research people do, for fun! And then they share it!

3) The meta analysis

I frickin love reading people's takes and analyses on series. I love learning, I love seeing perspectives from people with different cultural backgrounds to my own, it's all so fascinating! There's so much context we can miss due to our own privileges, or lack of knowing about various cultures, or due to whatever bubbles we've been living in. People here are just so smart, and nuanced, and willing to reflect and think about things, and also push back at each other, but generally with respect (except when you call out the dumb shit you see, usually on Twitter or TikTok, where people are being reductive and dumb about gender and sexuality).

And I've seen a few takes where people complain about analyses, and say that the director/production doesn't do everything deliberately, and we're all reading too much into it. To which I say, eh, lighten up. How people connect to and relate to media has relevance beyond what was intended. The point is we get to think and discuss and learn and grow. That doesn't happen if we don't analyze.

Special shout out here to @respectthepetty because colors mean things!

4) The wild theories

The other side of the analysis coin, the clown cars y'all drive around in with the wildest of theories. I have happily climbed into an occasional clown car, and usually I am utterly wrong (*cough* Saifah *cough*). But it's a super fun ride. I love seeing how people's brains work. I love it when y'all are wrong. I love it when y'all are right. It's beautiful.

5) Immediate acceptance

I am one of those people who knows that I have a lot of good qualities, and also, always kind of expect rejection. Blame the childhood bullies, I guess. Anyway, whenever I delve into a new space, I still feel like a total dork that no one will want to talk to. It's kind of a fraught way to move through the world, but I manage.

Anyway, I started posting my thoughts as they came up, and people are just totally cool with it. People even follow me sometimes. Even my silliest thoughts and dumbest jokes get at least a couple likes. It's so validating.

And my very silly joke about gay mafia in Kiseki has over 800 likes. I feel very seen.

6) Mutuals

I still kind of can't believe I have any. This ties in to the dork feeling above, but seriously - they are soooo cooooool. They're smart and awesome and funny, and they somehow find me worth following back, which is baffling yet wonderful. I want to squish their faces and give them many kisses (if they're into that kind of thing).

7) The self-exploration

I really appreciate how it's become more talked about how a lot of people are discovering queerness through BL, because that is so the case for me. I think it's both that I was in a bit of a hetero bubble before, and also that I'm evolving a bit as I age. I had figured out I was demi, and maybe a little bit gay, before getting in to BL, but being in this community, and seeing so many of you share so openly and freely, has made me realize it might be more than a little bit.

Either it was a new realization, or being around y'all has made me more gay. Win win, either way.

8) The weirdness

I'm weird. Y'all are weird. I love it.

9) The thirst

So many in this community are thirsty as fuck, and as someone who is in that same condition, I love that it's not just me. There are not many places where I can freely admit how horny I am as a part of my general existence.

Here? I could post about wanting to lick some random BL actor's face, and it would get a bunch of likes and some tags like #lickable, and it's just not remotely a big deal.

Also the gifmakers understand this, and give us beautiful cuts of our spicy scenes. They are genuinely too good for us.

10) The communal watching experience

There is absolutely nothing like watching along with people in the community. It is so worth the torture of having to wait week to week for new episodes. Seeing the show trend, watching the theories fly fast and furious, or the way everyone collectively loses their minds over particular moments. In a world that can feel very isolating, it's a very warm experience.

So there you go. Thank you all for being you. Here's to another year of QL shenanigans and losing our collective minds!

#bl community #ql community #bl series #ql series #thai bl

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becauseimanicequeen · 7 months ago

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Don't Ask Me for QL Recommendations Because My Taste is BAD

Bad as in TRASHY.

For your own good, don't ask me for recommendations.

I'm writing this because I've gotten some asks lately for QL recommendations and I wanted to spare you the pain.

If you still don't trust me (because to be fair, why would you? I'm just a random weirdo on the internet), let me tell you how bad my taste is so you'll know why I'm doing you a great favor by sparing you the pain.

(I also watch, and rewatch, series/films for ridiculous reasons, yet another reason not to listen to me. I’ll come back to this in a minute.)

Let's start with a brief rewind to a couple of decades ago (because it matters in this context).

The first queer content of any kind I can remember watching was Xena: The Warrior Princess in the late 90s and early 00s (I was a child/pre-teen at the time). It was such a pivotal point for me, which is why I remember it vividly. Not only was Lucy Lawless (the actress playing Xena) the most beautiful human being I had ever seen at that point, Xena was also queer and I loved her.

The series, though? It’s bad.

It’s over-the-top, contains ridiculous humor, face-palm-worthy fight scenes, etc., etc. (But, it was also the 90s, so it was quality television at the time, no matter what anyone else says.) It was so bad that it was ridiculously entertaining. I would watch it today (if I could find it anywhere…). That’s how bad my taste is (or how attached I am to bad shit).

That’s when the groundwork for my bad taste was laid. I blame THANK Xena: The Warrior Princess for it.

Then there was a huge skip until July last year when I found the Asian QL world, because I had no idea it even existed (I’m from Europe, btw).

(My personal story is that I fell into the queer/gay film world before the QL world, and the queer films I could find were made and released very sporadically. But ever since I found the treasure trove of Asian QL series in July 2023, I’ve watched 291 series/films as of right now.)

The reason I fell into the Asian QL world was thanks to a Short on YouTube with the main characters from Roommates of Poongduck 304 kissing. (Want to know what convinced me to watch it? One of them was wearing blue and the other pink, two of my favorite colors. Yep, that’s the reason. Told you it would be ridiculous.)

Since then, I’ve been exploring this rabbit hole and loving every second of all the bad shit that’s out there (there’s some great shit too, and some great things that aren’t shit at all, but they’re not really my taste because my taste is trashy, remember?).

I quickly noticed what my taste was pulling me towards and, in some cases, the trashier it was, the more I liked it.

(I’m talking about fiction here. I’m mature enough to be able to separate fiction from reality. Just because I enjoy watching a series/film that depicts a problematic topic, and sometimes do it in a problematic way, doesn’t mean I condone it in real life. I’m just putting this here as a disclaimer because people on the internet are easily offended nowadays. And I honestly don’t have time to respond to people who are venting their anger after purposefully misinterpreting what I’ve said, unless there’s a very valid reason, which there usually isn’t.)

So, what are some of my favorites that I absolutely do not recommend you watch?

Unless you want to watch trash, then, have at it. Just don't say I didn't warn you.

(Btw, if you like any of these, I apologize for calling your taste bad and trashy. But, if you like any of these, I think you already know your taste is bad. Also, if you like any of these, hey, bestie!)

Let’s start with the less extreme ones so I don’t scare you away from the start. After that, they’re in no particular order.

(With the issues/TW section for each series/film I include possible trigger warnings, taboo topics, what viewers/commenters have brought up as problematic, my possible issues with the writing, etc. I won’t list everything (because some of them would have looong lists) but I’m including some of the major ones.)

Kiseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, age gap, “adoptive” brothers becoming lovers, etc.

Both couples in this series have their own set of issues. Ai Di and Chen Yi are the “adoptive” brothers who become lovers while Ze Rui and Zong Yi have an age gap (I can’t remember how big of an age gap but I think it was close to 10-ish years).

(Before I move on there’s one thing you should know about me… I was born into a family with a varying degree of age gaps within marriages, from 2 to 23 years. Even though we’ve talked about the bigger age gaps occasionally, it’s never been an issue. I don’t mind age gaps as long as they’re legal. Does that mean I would hook up with someone in their late teens or early twenties? No. I would rather hook up with someone who has a fully developed brain, which science suggests doesn’t happen until somewhere in the mid-to-late-twenties. But it does mean that age gaps (as long as they’re legal) aren’t something I’ll be bothered by or judgemental of.)

Kiseki: Dear to Me is one of my favorite series because:

It’s from Taiwan, and the Taiwanese QLs are generally great at dealing with more difficult and taboo topics.

Ai Di is the feistiest, most colorful, and pettiest bitch and I love him with my entire ice-cold heart.

Chen Yi looks amazing in black.

The neon lights (because I’m a slut for that).

Also, the kissing (from both couples) is great.

You know, I did say that these would be series/films I absolutely do not recommend you watch. But I’ll actually recommend this one. Watch it. It’s great.

Unknown (Taiwan)

Issues/TW: Age gap, “adoptive” brothers becoming lovers, etc.

This is another one I’ll actually recommend you watch because it’s great.

The main couple (Qian and Yuan) are the “adoptive” brothers becoming lovers while the age gap is most prominent between San Pang (Qian’s business partner) and Lili (Qian’s younger sister). There’s also the fact that San Pang is part of their chosen family and has seen Lili grow up and stuff. So, if that bothers you, then don’t watch it.

The biggest reasons I would personally recommend it to those I know aren’t particularly bothered by taboo topics are because:

The yearning is palpable (and I love shit like that).

Qian would move heaven and earth for his family.

The great story.

The even more amazing acting.

Some moments made me bawl (and since I'm an ice queen, I get obsessed with shit that shatters my ice and makes me cry).

I know I said my taste is trashy… but I would actually give myself a gold star for loving this one.

Now, back to the real trash…

Love in the Air (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, SA, rape, MAME, etc.

Everyone and their aunt (or however the saying goes in English) seem to have an issue with MAME (the original creator of LITA and several other trashy BLs) and for good reason. (I would say that she improved a lot with Wedding Plan, which is the least problematic thing I’ve watched from her and it’s the latest series of hers, as of right now.) If she’s grown, remains to be seen. But it doesn’t change the fact that LITA has some issues.

Honestly, I just watch this for the visuals, as in the motorcycles and the neon lights. That’s it. That’s the reason.

I mean, if you look at the whole first sex scene between Sky and Prapai, you get what I mean with the neon lights. It’s divine. (I recently rewatched LITA for this very reason. A waste of time, you say? Not when you’re a slut for neon lights.)

Don’t watch this though! Just enjoy this gif instead…

I just saved you 13-ish hours of your life. You’re welcome.

TharnType and TharnType 2: 7 Years of Love (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, homophobia, domestic violence, MAME, etc.

Don’t watch this. This is bad. As in, really bad. And all the issues are in the main couple’s relationship.

But, since my taste is really bad, I rewatched this recently for horny reasons (it’s Mew, after all, and he’s got me in a chokehold for some reason). It’s still as bad as I remembered it, but I would still rewatch it for Mew’s sake (and because Techno is ridiculous throughout both seasons, which means I love him).

To be fair there are other, a lot spicier, series that I watch more often for horny reasons (yes, some of them are in this post because they’re trashy too), but none of them include Mew. And since I have to get my dose of Mew from time to time, I return to TharnType (especially the second season).

Big Dragon (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, blackmail, etc.

This isn’t that problematic in my opinion, but there is definitely a drug-induced sexcapade that’s taped and used for blackmail for a while. And that's how the series starts.

I recently did a rewatch of this and it was still bad (in a good way) and I loved every second of it.

What I love about this series are:

The visuals. The set designs are beautiful (especially Yai’s home and the bar, before he demolishes it). As a visual artist, this is speaking to my soul.

The chemistry between Yai and Mangkorn.

Pong and Park. Two idiots I love with my whole ice-cold heart.

And the title track because it’s addictive as hell to listen to.

Also, the sex (which my horny ass needs). Let's not forget the sex. Those scenes were also visually stunning, which made me love them even more.

Honestly, I'll kneel and bow down to this shit because it's that great.

Don’t trust my judgment, though, because my taste is trashy.

Only Friends (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Manipulation, stalking, promiscuity, etc.

This series is messy in terms of intrigue (especially from Boston and then Boeing’s part). The ending had some issues. The sex isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, either. I, on the other hand, would drink a whole pot of this.

Overall, I loved this trash. Mainly because of:

How visually stunning it is.

Sand. He’s a hardworking, good person. He’s also a proud bi!

How they depicted and handled Ray’s addiction and recovery. (I know some watchers were upset that the focus of the series landed on Sand and Ray towards the end while neglecting the other characters, which is a valid point. However, setting that aside, the way they portrayed Ray’s addiction and then his road to recovery in the last couple of episodes was realistic, and I loved it.)

The promiscuity, because I loved it and the mess it created.

Boston being a slutty asshole. The more of a slutty asshole he was, the more I loved him. (I know, it’s a me-problem.)

Boeing coming in and kissing (almost) everyone.

It’s trashy, it’s messy, and I love it!

But, I don’t recommend it to anyone.

My Beautiful Man 1, 2, and 3 Eternal (Japan)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, obsession, bullying, lack of (or no real) communication, etc.

I love this series (2 seasons + 1 film), but I honestly don’t see it as particularly problematic. But I know others will disagree with me, so here it is on my list of trashy QLs.

I don’t mind Hira’s obsession because I know Kiyoi is just as whipped for Hira (even though he doesn’t know how to communicate it to Hira at first, especially in a way that Hira understands). Would I be okay with someone’s obsession and stalking in real life? Of course not. But, as I mentioned before, I’m mature enough to separate fiction from reality.

Also, I love miscommunicating characters, especially when the misunderstandings they create bring out all the emotions (angst, hurt, anger, sadness, embarrassment, etc.) and even the flight response. I especially love miscommunicating characters when they learn to communicate throughout the series/film. And this series is especially delicious on the miscommunicating part.

But, it’s also problematic, apparently. So, don’t watch it.

The End of the World With You (Japan)

Issues/TW: Blackmail, biphobia, cheating, etc.

I’ll be honest and say that I’ve only watched this series three times. And that’s because the biphobia is fucking annoying. In this series, the bi character is depicted as a cheater (which is common in QLs, btw). It’s an exasperating stereotype. Cheating has nothing to do with your sexuality and everything to do with who you are as a person.

(I mean, you can be a proud bi like Payu in LITA or Sand in OF. They have eyes only for one person as soon as they’re pursuing or dating someone. Give me more bi characters like this, please.)

We could discuss how cheating can be used as characterization in certain stories. But not in this one. Here, they’re basically using Ritsu’s bisexuality as the reason he’s cheating (since he’s sleeping with Masumi while having a thing going on with a girl, and then sleeping with a girl when he has a thing with Masumi), which is why it’s bothering me in this series.

If I’m going to tell you why I like this series, however, it’s for 2 reasons:

It’s about getting a second chance, a topic I love.

The sex (laser-focused horny Ritsu is my favorite Ritsu).

Check Out (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Biphobia, cheating, lazy writing, etc.

(It should be mentioned that I’ve read some comments about some issues involving the company behind this series. I haven’t dug deeper into this so I don’t really know if there’s any substance to the comments I’ve read (like official statements from the company or the other people involved, etc.). But I’m putting this out there in case this might be a potential issue for you (even though I’ve already told you that I don’t recommend you watch any of these because they’re all trashy).)

When I first checked this out at the beginning of this year, this series seemed to have created a storm of bad comments and reviews on MDL since it first came out. So, obviously, I needed to watch it because my taste is trashy.

And, you know what? I loved it!

Besides having the bi character depicted as a cheater (again, the use of this biphobic stereotype is so fucking annoying) and the sporadic clunky and stale scenes, I loved this series because:

It’s about second chances. As I mentioned before, I love that topic.

Best (the actor playing Daonuea) is the best in this series. There’s just something about him that grabs my attention every time. He has me in a similarly tight chokehold as Mew.

There’s sex (and my horny ass needs it).

But, it’s also trash, so don’t watch it.

Pit Babe (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Domestic violence, non-consensual, SA, age gap, etc.

This became popular. Really popular. I saw people comment about it everywhere. And usually, when stuff becomes popular, it’s more than likely reduced to trash quality by the general public. So, obviously, I had to watch it.

Did I end up loving it? Yes.

Honestly, the biggest issue this series had for me was the whole omegaverse thing (this was a new thing for me because I don’t come from an erotic fiction background, my head was rather stuck in fantasy fiction). And, from my limited understanding of this, they didn’t seem to fully commit to the omegaverse thing in Pit Babe, which was unfortunate.

The racing was also so-so for me, which hurt my soul because I usually love racing (cars, mcs, boats, etc.).

What I did like, however, was:

The chemistry between Pete and Kenta (and I’m so sad I only got crumbs of this).

Pavel (the actor playing Babe). I would watch and listen to him recite product placement scripts for toothpaste all day long.

The sex, especially the scene with Babe and Charlie in ep. 9 (even though it was mixed with clips from the racing) and Jeff and Alan’s scene in ep. 13 (because it was sensual, if we ignore the music).

The neon lights (have I mentioned that I’m a slut for neon lights?). I mean, just look at this:

I can watch that pinkish light all day long, even though Babe and Charlie are trying to distract me. (Especially Pavel!)

Dead Friend Forever (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Grooming, bullying, suicide & suicide attempts, etc.

Besides the issues listed above, this also suffered from lazy writing at the end. BUT, I fucking loved DFF anyway.

I never expected to love this series because it’s just a bunch of teenagers stuck at a house in the woods. How interesting could that be? Turns out, very.

DFF wasn’t perfect (perfection doesn’t exist anyway), but what I loved about it was:

The morally ambiguous characters.

The revenge plot.

The poetic justice.

The questioning of what was real vs hallucination.

The visually stunning shots.

The mask!

And Tan’s mask!

The beheading scene.

I could go on, but you get the point. I just love this piece of trash.

But, please, don’t watch it. You will suffer from brain rot. Trust me.

I, however, am currently rewatching this because I choose the brain rot. And my taste is trashy, remember? Or, perhaps I just love watching chaos unfold…

HIStory 3: Make Our Days Count (Taiwan)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, age gap, tragic ending, etc.

Everyone and their aunt and even their dog have an issue with the ending of this one. And it’s understandable.

I don’t necessarily like or dislike the ending. Obviously, the bury your gays trope is tragic in itself, and, tragically, it’s still being used. That’s why I couldn’t find myself liking the ending, even though I don’t mind tragic endings. (Romeo and Juliet is one of my favorite classics, which people tend to forget is a tragedy and not a romance, btw, but I digress…)

At the same time, though, this series made me cry for a whole episode before tragedy struck because I could feel it. And you have no idea how obsessed I get about shit that makes me cry (since I’m an ice queen).

(Another side note: one of my favorite BLs is Once Again, which made me bawl throughout the whole series. It’s not on this list because it’s neither trashy nor bad, but it’s still one of my favorites because it broke me in the best ways. But, anyway…)

The best part of this series from beginning to end was the other couple, at least for me. This couple is the one with the age gap (which, again, doesn’t bother me) and I fucking love them! One, because Wilson Liu (the actor playing Bo Xiang) is such a gem. Second, because their first time was such a spur-of-the-moment thing fueled by a desire that went from 0-100kph in less time than a Ferrari would. And I loved it (just as much as the squeezing of boobs from behind, which, for some reason, appeals to me).

Also, the twins are so pretty it’s annoying.

Do I recommend it, though? No, because I don’t have time to respond to the clap back I’ll get when you come to the end.

HIStory 4: Close to You (Taiwan)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, SA, obsession, age gap, stepbrothers becoming lovers, etc.

This one has some problems (especially the relationship between Yong Jie and Xing Si), but I love both the series and its problems (yes, I’m trash). You could say that I’m as obsessed with this series as Yong Jie is with Xing Si. Would I get this series drunk and fuck the living daylights out of it? No. But I would watch it once every 3 months or so. Oh, wait… I already do that. Because I’m trash.

What do I love so much about this series (other than what I mentioned above):

It’s from Taiwan.

Li Cheng is ridiculous, which is exactly why I love him.

Every time I rewatch it, it gets funnier.

The chemistry between Li Cheng and Teng Teng is amazing.

As well as the chemistry between Yong Jie and Xing Si.

The kissing is just as amazing.

The main fujoshi girl, Mei Fang, is so cute I can’t handle her.

And the bathroom scene! In that lighting! It’s iconic!

I don’t care what anyone else says. This is fucking gold to me. But, then again, my taste is trash. So, don’t listen to me.

KinnPorsche (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Dubious consent, SA, torture, Stockholm syndrome-ish, etc.

This is some next-level trash, and I fucking love it.

Two of the major relationships in this series (Kinn & Porsche and Vegas & Pete) are problematic at some point. Especially Vegas and Pete who have this whole captor/captive, torture, BDSM-ish type relationship. Of course, I love Vegas and Pete because my taste is super trashy (yes, it’s a me-problem, but I don’t force my taste on other people, so, for the love of all that is holy, don’t watch this!).

Other reasons I love this series and rewatch it from time to time:

It’s visually stunning! The cinematography is amazing. As I mentioned before, I’m a visual artist, so this is a very valid reason for me to watch it again and again. And again.

The neon lights.

The whole mafia thing.

The sex (because my horny ass needs it).

Playboyy (Thailand)

Issues/TW: SA, homophobia, suicide, etc.

I was debating whether or not to add this to my list solely based on the ending. However, up until that point, I really liked it.

The fact that every episode starts with a whole ass list of trigger warnings tells me this is my shit. And it was.

At times, it was so bad that it was good (until the ending, which was just so bad it was bad). The things I liked were:

The mystery.

Win (who played Nuth). His acting was great.

The chemistry between Nuth and Phop.

The tattooed daddy that’s Aob and his chemistry with Puen (there’s also an age gap here, btw, but as I’ve mentioned before, it’s fine by me as long as it’s legal).

The weird ass sex scenes (and the underwear).

And the not so weird ass sex scenes (like the ones between Aob and Puen and the ones between Nuth and Phop).

But, this series is trashy. Keep as far away from it as possible. If you still decide to dip in, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Red Wine in the Dark Night (Thailand)

Issues/TW: Obsession, blood, human blood bags, etc.

This is a queer film that’s BL-ish with some dark themes. Mainly, it’s about how far Wine would go to help the person he’s fallen for (or become attached to).

What I loved about this film was:

Fluke (who plays Wine). He’s such a great actor and I love him in everything he does.

Wine who is so desperate to love someone and be loved that he ends up doing some weird shit.

The darker and sadder vibe, which I love.

Irresistible Love 1 and Irresistible Love 2 (China)

(This is also called Uncontrolled Love.)

Issues/TW: Obsession, homophobia, codependency, adoptive brothers becoming lovers, etc.

This is another queer film (in two parts) that is more BL-ish than the films I’m getting into below.

This depicts a weird relationship dynamic between Xie Yan and Shu Nian where Shu Nian was basically adopted into the family to become Xie Yan’s friend/babysitter/lackey. This is some weird ass shit, and I love weird ass shit so I really enjoyed this rare, uncensored, gem from China.

But, it’s also trashy. So, don’t watch it.

The next couple of films I’ll mention are (obviously) trashy, but also complex and deep (which is why I love them).

One Summer Night (South Korea)

Issues/TW: Obsession, dependency, oppression, etc.

This is a low-budget film from 2016 (so, production-wise, it’s definitely nothing like the usual stuff from South Korea you can watch on Netflix), but I love it.

It’s gritty, it’s raw, it’s explicit (an emphasis on explicit because you’ll see dicks), it deals with being a North Korean defector but ending up in an impoverished situation in South Korea, and it ends with a dubious ending you can interpret in different ways.

This is definitely not for the general QL viewers who watch QLs for the cutesy stuff.

And it's trashy. So, don’t watch it.

Dangerous Drugs of Sex (Japan)

Issues/TW: All the trigger warnings! Seriously. I feel like it’s better to say that so you’ll look up the TWs for yourself (if you choose to watch this, which I'm asking you not to) rather than me mentioning a few and forgetting others.

With this film, what others see are all the trigger warnings (and, yes, I see them too, they’re fucking obvious). However, I can see beyond that and watch it for what it is at the core: Two characters dealing with incredible grief.

Grief is a topic that often affects me and I can relate to it because I’ve had to deal with a lot of grief in my relatively short life. Watching a film like this where grief pushes the characters to their very limits will (often) get a special place in my heart, especially if done well. And it’s done very well in this film.

Do I condone the characters’ behaviors? No (especially not Yoden Ryoji’s). But I do understand that grief can send you over the edge (and in some cases throw you off the edge) because I’ve experienced it. I do understand that grief can cause you to make horrible decisions because I’ve done it (though, not this extreme). I do understand that grief can be self-destructive because I’ve been there. This film shows it all. That’s why I love it so much.

Do I recommend you watch this, tough? No. Don’t do it. This is not for everyone. It’s definitely not for those who watch QLs for the cutesy stuff.

But it is for me because I love trash. Especially good trash. And this is the best trash I’ve ever seen when it comes to gay films.

Anything by Scud Cheng

Lastly, I want to mention any film by Scud Cheng because…

And I’m an artist so art means everything to me.

Cheng is a screenwriter and director from Hong Kong. His films, the ones I’ve seen, are gritty, nude, and real. They are more on the art side than the others I’ve listed above, which is why they have a special place in my heart.

They’re also deep and explore themes like introspection (are we doing things because we believe they’re the right thing to do, or because external forces have “brainwashed” us to believe they’re the normal thing to do?), the porn industry and how it exploits young and queer men, death, politics, and love, to name a few.

These are not for the average QL watcher. They’re not for the faint of heart. They’re not for those who want an entertaining watch.

These films require multiple viewings. I’ve watched some once, some twice, and some more times, and I still find new themes and meanings woven into the stories. So, they’re complex and deep.

But, don’t watch them because I know you’ll come at me later. So, to spare us both the time and energy it would take to argue about this shit, just don’t watch any of it.

Now, if you still want to ask me for recommendations after all that, don't tell me I didn't warn you!

136 notes · View notes

hoshologies · 1 year ago

Note

moon… give me ur mtl for 7dream on who would be most likely to keep their hand up your shirt in public… like shamelessly keeping their fingers dancing on your waistline >:)

not mia coming into my inbox w menace behavior omg…… anyways !

⌗ most likely.

haechan: a menace to society. has a hand under your shirt at any given moment because he's obsessed with you, but will do it in public to embarrass you like when you're ordering at a cafe or a food stand. plays innocent when you question him about it later.

jaemin: vey cat coded. does it in the same way a cat knocks things off a table: he knows it annoys you. you've learned to not give much of a reaction because he'll stop faster, but sometimes, he'll let his fingers dip under your waistband just to rile you up a little.

jeno does it, but less in a teasing way and more in a comforting way. he mostly just likes the reminder that you're together and hopes that any guy who looks at you sees his hand under your shirt and takes the hint. but he does like teasing you too, letting his fingers brush your hips, press into the small of your back. just smiles when you look at him questioningly.

mark is a little freaky, though definitely not as much as haenomin. he'll do this on a few occasions when he's feeling like being a little annoying, slipping his hand quietly under the hem of your shirt. he'll run his fingers right along the top of the waistline and drop a kiss to your shoulder when he knows that you know what he's doing.

chenle definitely mostly only does it when he sees other people checking you out; how else is he supposed to show others that you're taken without making out in front of them? there are a few occasions where he'll do this after you were doing the same to him though. all's fair in love and war, of course, so what's a little revenge?

renjun, like chenle, has other ways of teasing you in public, but he gets his moods of course. they're few and far between, but he does get them. and you're in for it when he does. he keeps it subtle, like when you're sitting on a bench or next to each other at a table, thumb sweeping anything but sweetly over your skin, big doe eyes confused when you elbow him in his ribs... but he knows what he's doing.

jisung is just so sweet and really cannot bring himself to put his hands anywhere; even holding your hand or putting his arm around your shoulders is kind of pushing it. he knows the others boys do it with their partners, but he's just not ready for that yet.

⌗ least likely.

want to send me an request? read my rules here!

#nct dream x reader #nct dream smut #nct x reader #nct smut #nct dream fic #nct fic #besties.ask #mia.ask #moon.answer #nct dream.thought #hard.thought

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adventuringblind · 10 months ago

Text

Unrequited Understanding

Norlestappen x Reader

Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort

Summary: Her father comes back into her life as a replacement race engineer. Now she can't escape him and his voice when she does the one thing she thought he couldn't touch.

Warnings: eating disorder, abuse, past child abuse, sef harm, suicide attempt

Notes: for @ashiekins, I hope you like it! I'M SORRY FOR THE ENDING I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF!

Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi

January

The new year had never felt so sweet. Her victory with Max and Redbull had been a dream. Max taking another championship, had the entire team walking on cloud nine.

She spent new years with her boys. It's tradition at this point to messily kiss all together as the new year comes around.

They'd done so much for her. She's come so far in her journey.

"What are you thinking about, Love?" Neither her nor Lando could sleep. Most nights, they end up talking to get the heavy thoughts to lessen a bit. It's why they get one half of the bed to themselves.

"How nice it feels to know I'm still here and loved." She rests her head on Lando's chest, the steady rythme of his heart lulling her into a restful state.

"Life wouldn't be the same without you." He kisses the top of her head as her mind finally gives into sleep.

February

Her and Max sit together at the large conference table. The factory is preparing for the new season. Energy is running high, and she can feel it crackling in the atmosphere.

Christian talks about how excited he is for the new season. 2023 is going to be theirs to dominate. Adrian has been working tirelessly to give them a title worthy car.

"We have had to make some last-minute changes to the team, unfortunately." Christian makes eye contact with her, and the good feeling she had dissolves. "Your race engineer has fallen terminally ill and is being hospitalized. The good news is we've found a last-minute replacement."

The door opens, and she feels the air leave her lungs. Her body shakes in fear of the man who takes confident strides to his chair.

Christian introduces them, clearly not understanding that they know each other very well. The man is her father, after all.

She has her mother's last name. Intent on separating herself from him entirely. He'd been doing Indie car for years. She never thought he'd make the switch after how they left things.

Max shoots her a concerned look, but she shakes it off. None of the boys had ever seen what her father looks like. They don't know she changed her last name.

She has no intention of ruining a good season because of her petty emotions. So, she says nothing.

March

It's not as bad as she thought it would be. They don't interact much aside from talking about data and while she's in the car.

The underhanded comments make her thoughts reel. The constant questioning of her skill while she's driving makes her think she's crazy. Her father is too good at making it look like a joke. People laugh with him, not understanding he means what he says.

He talks over her, cuts her off, bosses her around like she's still a child. She shrinks in on herself every time he cones around.

Stay silent and listen. That's what got her through her childhood. Just don't make him angry.

He lashes out when he's angry.

Charles is there when a nightmare causes her to be sick. A memory of her childhood that haunts her still.

The Monegasque holds her hair up and rubs her back as she sobs. He makes her a warm drink and holds her, letting her wet tears soak into his shirt.

"Do you want to talk about it, mon chéri?" He whispers gently against her forehead.

She inhales, breath catching in her throat as she does. "My dad, he - well - he used to say I'd never be anything. I sometimes dream about the memory."

"Your father and Jos can fuck off." Charles cups her face with his hands. "You are amazing. Whatever he told you is a lie. You've proven yourself to the world. Your younger self can rest knowing she got you here, that you are safe and loved and enough."

April

It's getting worse by the day. She's not sure where her father got the idea that he could order her around like she's still five and karting. It's getting annoying and ridiculous.

He's taken to snatching any food out of her hand and tossing it away into the nearest bin. What a waste. He could've eaten it himself.

He keeps telling her the car is too heavy. The data doesn't show that, but whatever. Her food being taken from her like when she was young was not how she expected the season to go. She takes to not eating because it's easier than fighting with him.

Her physio keeps asking her about why her weight seems to be plummeting recently. Even trying to get it back on her with altered meal plans. The concerns get brought up later in a meeting with Christian. The severity of her condition being made apparent.

Max watches her sob over a salad. She can tell he wants to push, asked what is causing the relapse. Understand where her head is at.

He hands her a water bottle and waits until she drinks the entire thing. "It's okay to struggle, but please don't shut us out. You don't have to do this alone, alright?"

She doesn't respond, simply collapses into his patient arms.

May

Lando and Charles happened to be passing by at the worst time. The Redbull garage still buzzing with the excitement of Max's podium and her mediocre result compared.

They saw her race engineer laying into her about every mistake. No other staff around to hear the conversation. Her head hung in shame as he pointed out every flaw.

Charles interrupts with such ease. He says her PR officer was looking for her earlier. It gets her to excuse herself from the conversation, leaving the two boys with her engineer.

"Mind your own business next time," scoffs the older man. He leaves the younger two confused.

Charles takes in Lando's mildly anxious body movements. "Something isn't right, Charles. She had that same look from when we were rookies."

Charles hums in agreement. "We'll have to wait for her to come to us for now."

June

The underhanded comments are getting progressively worse. People have started noticing that something is off about her race engineer and his behavior towards her.

Meetings are difficult and the team is walking on eggshells. Max looks ready to explode and has been ripping her father to pieces after every comment. He gets in trouble, so she asks him to stop.

She doesn't mind. Her whole life has been taking this kind of behavior from him. Max knows better than anyone that it's best to respect that kind of ask.

"I'm here if things ever get to a point where you want it to stop. I will always be here for you."

July

Her wight combined with her self-harming habits are making it harder to drive. Somewhere in her head she knows she can't continue like this. The car no longer works with her.

Christian keeps pulling her into his office and asking her about where she's at. Warning her the if she continues down this road, she won't be able to drive. That he'll be forced to find a replacement.

She cries as the boys hold her. She tells them she's not sure if she can do it anymore, that she's not cut out for this sport. They comfort and reassure her that's a lie.

Her thoughts remain stuck on being a burden to them. She gets better just to fall once more into her old habits. They have careers and goals that would be easier to achieve without her around.

Maybe her father is right about her after all.

August

The summer break brings them a much-needed reprieve from the fast-paced world they live in. She gets to spend time away from the incessant voice of the man she hates. Her boys occupying her mind instead.

There is a finality about this that she can't explain. Like things can only get better from here on out. That something in her future is going to bring her the one thing she's looking for.

Swimming in the ocean and eating what they want. They laugh and joke like nothing has changed. It's the first time in months that she feels normal.

This is how things should be. The smile on her face is genuine and the boys can all tell.

September

The cuts line her skin in an unorganized fashion. Angry, red, and bleeding. Her race had been ended early due to a collision. She'd been collateral damage; it wasn't her fault.

The media didn't see it that way. Her father definitely had no mercy when he mercilessly explained how she will never be good enough as a driver.

Hidden away in her drivers' room now, watching the blood pour from her skin. The boys know, they've seen the fresh lines. They are trying to find a way to get her to stop, but these feeling are fighting back harder than ever before. She's not sure how to fight them anymore.

Disappearing seems like the best option. The only way she'll be able to escape the dark thoughts swirling in her head. The one place her father won't be able to touch her anymore will be in her death.

She moans as the blade digs deeper. The ecstasy that accompanies addiction is a feeling she will always crave. Sick satisfaction bubbles in her throat and pour out on her eyes as red stains the floor.

This wasn't her plan, but it's okay. The pain makes all her thoughts go away. Lessens the weight on her chest. Forces her mind to focus on something else.

Everything is spinning and then it goes dark.

Warm hands and comforting words. That's all she's ever wanted.

October

The boys can see how sick she is. Max won't let her be alone in the garage. Not after she almost died.

Her physio is with her when none of the boys are. They keep asking her questions that she won't give answers to.

It's not until an altercation with her father is finally caught. He's condemning her over the radio while she's driving. They'd had an argument earlier about how she should be taking turn three.

The public execution is miserable. Still, she puts her head down and drives.

The second-place trophy has never felt heavier. It drags her arms downwards as she heads to the garage with Max. He doesn't know about what happened yet and she hopes it stays that way. She screams as she puts it away in her room.

She avoids her father as much as possible on the way to the press conference. The glimpse she does get of him leaves a bitter taste in her mouth. Christian looks angry as he presses a finger into her father's chest.

She's zoned out majority of the conference. Until A journalist with a soft voice is asking about her feelings towards her race engineer.

"It's just how things are sometimes. I wasn't listening to instructions, and he was frustrated. It happens." She shrugs it off like this is the most normal everyday occurrence. Which, in her defense, it kind of is.

Every media outlet seems to want to know more about it. Her emotions are struggling to remain contained. the inevitable sobs escape after a particularly worded question about whether his actions could be considered abuse or not.

She breaks, collapsing in the middle of the media pen. Her boys are there blocking the view of the cameras as her body fails to move.

They know now what has been happening. Her secret is out there for everyone to see.

November

Her father is fired from the team with immediate effect. Christian apologizes relentlessly for not knowing and not seeing it sooner.

The media is asked to refrain from asking about the incident and anything regarding her past race engineer. They respect it, probably wanting to avoid another meltdown in the middle of an interview.

Max, Lando and Charles are with her through every step of the way. They encourage her to talk to them and she does. It feels nice not having to hold in her family secrets.

They want to help her, and she wants to be helped.

Her race engineer for the end of the season ends up taking the job for next year. He's kind and keeps his voice calm. Her last few drives amaze everyone.

The top step of the podium has never felt so good. She didn't need to prove herself to anyone, but the confidence it brings her is hard to deny.

Closure feels even better.

December

Her therapist is proud of her for opening up to the boys more. They don't push her to spill everything, but they encourage her when she does.

The end of the year pulls them closer together. After everything that happened, she wasn't sure she was going to see 2024 come around. She's glad she does though.

She fought to the end. She made it to her peace. A place where her father can't touch.

Warm hands and gentle words for all of eternity.

January... Again

Three boys stand in front of a grave. Her favorite flowers in hand. The silence stretches between them. None of them know how to proceed.

The memory of finding her on the floor replays in Max's head. He should've known to find her right after the race. That cold September afternoon in Zandvoort. The day she bled out for one final time.

Charles and Lando assure Max it's not his fault. IT hadn't been her plan. There was no note, not even a warning sign aside from her mental health declining.

Her father, who they now know was the catalyst for her relapse, is in jail. Christian made sure to get him put away so the boys wouldn't have to worry about it.

The other drivers came to the funeral. The journalists respect their wishes not to speak on the matter. They need to heal before they can even think about trying to explain how all three of them had taken time off.

The FIA pushed the races back since Redbull needed to sort things out. The memorial on the track has been visited by everyone on the team.

They tried so hard. They wanted her to stay. They can only hope that she found what she needed in whatever lies beyond this life.

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billthedrake · 10 months ago

Text

HALL PASS

Story idea from @aestheticsupremacy

It was still summer warm as the two lacrosse jocks walked across campus after practice. Brian was going on about the chick he had a date with late that evening and was teasing Jake.

"Dude... if you ever wanted pussy, you'd be so set. Girls fucking love gay guys."

Jake laughed, his blond hair still on the lighter side from summer beach time. He and the star attacker got along great because they never BS-ed each other. "Bro, I don't think it works that way," he said, flashing his dimples. "Besides, I think all those sorority girls want a gay pal they can go to the clubs with. I can't dance worth shit."

"You can't," Brian grinned. "You got the moves on the field but, fuck..."

Both guys laughed as they entered the residence hall, one of the nicer ones where a lot of the athletes lived.

"Hey Jake!" the student worker at the front desk said when he saw the two jocks. "Some mail came for you."

"Mail?" he asked as the walked up to the desk. Normally, mail got delivered to their mailboxes, which Jake didn't check regularly. Who the fuck sends mail these days anyway, other than advertisers?

The desk guy nodded. "Yeah, certified or something. Looks important." He reached over and pulled out a document sized cardboard envelope.

"Hey, I'll catch ya later, Hoss," Brian said as he bumped fists with his teammate buddy.

"Yah," Jake said, then looked back down at the envelope. There was a familiar return address. It was his dad's work. Jake's father was a high-powered executive - not Fortune 500 but CFO for a top financial firm. Leave it to Dad to send paperwork in hard copy. Jake tried to rack his brain to guess what document was so urgent, but maybe it was some school form he needed to sign. Maybe Jake should take more responsibility for those things, but his dad tended to look after the details.

"Thanks, Mitch," he told the desk guy, then went to the elevators to go up to his room.

It was quiet in his room, since his roommate had taken off Thursday afternoon to go home for a long weekend. He got along well with Ed, a varsity baseball player, but they weren't real tight. And Jake liked having the alone time and privacy sometimes.

The lacrosse jock set down his phone and keys and shook his head with a chuckle as he opened the envelope. "You're so fucking old school, Dad," he said aloud. "I love it."

It wasn't a form inside, but instead there was a linen-white stationary with his Dad's company logo and his father's name and title embossed. "From the Desk of Steven J. Weir."

It was what was printed below that made Jake's heart stop.

"Dear Mr. Wier:

This letter serves as official notice that Jacob Peter Weir has his father's permission to have sex as often as he likes and with whomever he likes, from the date of August 20, 2023 to May 14, 2024. This arrangement will be extended in subsequent years unless the two parties renegotiate their terms.

sincerely,

Steve Weir"

There was his father's recognizable wide, cursive signature, undoubtedly written with one of his favorite blue-ink fountain pens that his family had given him for Christmas.

Jake was rock hard. "Fuck," he hissed.

Only then did he realize there was something else in the envelope. He reached in and pulled out three photographs, each 8x10 glossy portraits of this father. They were different poses of his dad in business attire, like professional headshots for a company website or something.

"Got your package," the jock texted his father.

It took a second but then a message came up from Dad: "You able to Facetime?"

Jake got a big grin as he hit the dial button to video call his father. His heart jumped a little as the image filled his phone screen. His dad was in his C-suite office and looking handsome as fuck in his tailored suit as his own horny grin matched his son's.

"Hey Sport," he said. "Looking good." He leaned back in his swivel chair and angled the phone to give Jake a better view of his suited upper body. He had a good knowledge by now of what pushed his boy's buttons.

"You too Dad," the jock hissed, reaching down to paw his crotch again. "I can't believe it's only been 24 hours since I've seen your face... fuck."

His father laughed. Because Steve felt the same way. He knew it would be hard when Jake went off to college, but he was going through sexual withdrawal in addition to the normal empty nest syndrome.

Only now his bright smile got a hint of nervousness. "What did you think of what I sent you, son?"

Jake felt that constriction in his throat. Sorta like the first time he knew he was gonna fuck his dad... that combination of sheer horniness and disbelief it was gonna happen.

"You know, Dad," the 19-year-old smirked, "A hall pass isn't an actual piece of paper."

Steve's brown eyes seemed bright. Happy. Excited. "I wanted to make it official. For you. For us." The exec was definitely getting that bedroom voice, and Jake could tell by the movement in his dad's upper body that the man was reaching down to unzip and haul out his cock.

For his part Jake tugged down his shorts with one hand to free his junk, which was firming up real fucking fast. His father had given him the encouragement to freeball it, and it was now Jake's preferred way of casual dress. It made him feel free and sexual.

Jake prided himself on the sexual confidence he'd learned to project with his dad, but times like this he still felt unsure, deep down. "I told you, Dad. I don't need to have sex with other guys."

"You're 18, Sport," his dad said resolutely. "A college kid should be spreading his wings."

Jake got a playful grin. His right hand was working up and down his bone while his left hand held the phone. "You really want me to fuck other guys?" he asked. Pointed. Challenging.

Steve shook his head no. "Honestly, no. I don't. But I want you to lead the life that's going to make you happy." His own fist was working up and down in his lap. "I want you to become your own man, Jakey."

Something about that nickname drove the jock wild. He felt a spurt of precum in his palm. "You think sending me 8x10 glossies is gonna make me happy," he hissed. Jake's tone was halfway between a statement and a question.

Steve loved watching his son get in horndog mode. He'd like to think he passed that on to Jake genetically, but something about the kid's sex drive seemed innate. And all Jake.

The exec's voice got low and gravely. "You tell me, son. Did they make you happy?"

Jake just let go of his prick and angled his phone down to capture the hard teen bone that stood up long and rigid. "This is the reaction those pics got." He pulled the phone back up to see the amused and pleased look on his father's face.

"I'm glad," Steve said. Then with a pause, he angled the phone to show Jake his own fatherly prick, standing out from his unzipped suit.

"I wish I could suck that, Dad," Jake said, enjoying the freedom to talk aloud like this. "I wish I was there right now."

"You primed for some office sex, Sport?"

"Fuuuckk, Dad." Jake's fist was now steadily pumping his jock bone. "I'm still pissed off you won't let me fuck you there."

That got a laugh out of his father. The 49-year-old was even more handsome when he smiled. "You're a spoiled brat, you know that?"

"Fuck yeah I am," Jake shot back, getting into the zone with the teasing sex talk with his father. It came to them so fucking easily. "Something about nailing your dad regularly will make you that way."

That got a soft growl from the executive, and Jake watched as his father reached up to flip his tie over the shoulder of his suit coat, getting it out of the way.

"Damn, you gonna cum on your shirt today, Dad?"

Steve shook his head. "Hopefully not... but just in case. You get me so worked up, Sport." Off screen Jake knew his father had gone back to stroking his hard dick.

"So, Dad... if I take you up on that hall pass... what are you gonna do?"

"Whaddya mean, Jakey?"

"I mean..." the teen's own fist was working up and down his cock. "Does that mean you get a hall pass, too?"

"That's not part of the deal," Steve said, his brown eyes now wide with excitement. "But Buddy... I honestly don't know how I'm gonna get through this year. I guess I'll be doing a lot more of what I'm doing right now."

That got a matching growl from his son, whose hand moved faster and faster on his prick. "A fucking waste of dad cum."

That got a grin from Steve. "You like my sperm, huh, Jakey?"

"Can't get enough, Dad," came the immediate response. For a confident top when it came to fucking, Jake loved to taste his dad's prick and to eat his father's semen. When he wasn't sucking his dad off, he'd be licking the cum off the man's well-fucked body.

The jock felt another spurt of precum when his Dad brought the phone down close to his crotch, that solid, thick seven incher sticking out from the unzipped suit trousers.

"That's my dad," Jake growled. He'd have to find a way to have phone sex more often.

"Wanna cum for me, Jakey?" Steve asked, his voice signaling he was already on the edge.

"Nah," the jock said. "Hold off one second," he urged. He set down the phone and stripped off his T-shirt and kicked away his lax shorts. He then angled the phone just right on his desk and stepped back. Even from the distant view, he could see his dad's face will up the phone screen.

"Damn..." Steve growled. "That's my boy."

Jake felt fully alive, head to toe, as he stroked his cock and showed off for his father. He knew he was a good looking stud, with a great toned, athletic body. But his father's approval made him feel that much studlier.

"So Dad..." the teen asked. "If I used that hall pass, you wanna hear about the guys?"

"I don't know, Sport," Steve said with visible mixed feelings. "I'll let that be your call, OK?" He watched his son intently, as if it was the last chance he'd see Jake naked and hard. "I almost didn't send it," he confessed.

That made his son grin and Jake removed his fist from his dick, showing off the erection by swinging it side to side. "Yeah? It was so fucking hot to read it, Dad. You know, that you'd even send it."

"I'm glad, Jake," came Steve's reply.

"We're you hard writing it?" the son asked.

Steve's voice got soft and low. "I was, son."

"You want me spreading my wings in college, huh?" Jake's hand resumed its stroke. He really wanted his dad to cum first today but he didn't know if he'd be able to hold off.

Fortunately, Steve was getting into the zone now. Jake could only see his face, not his cock or masturbating fist, but he recognized that horny tone in his father's voice. "God, Jakey, you're such a fucking stud... seems wrong if you can't enjoy college a little, you know?"

Jake grinned, getting into a slow stroke that seemed to keep things on the boil without erupting over. "Maybe I'll line up some hot coach to fuck... but you know if I do, I'll be thinking of you the whole time, Dad."

That got an audible groan from Steve. Which only encouraged Jake to go further.

"Yeah, I'll be balls deep in some daddy ass and have to shut my eyes so I can think of my father... of fucking you..."

"Yes," Steve hissed. He was getting closer to cumming.

"of bending my dad over his office desk and pulling down those suit pants of yours..."

"You're not gonna stop pestering till you get that will ya, Jakey?"

"No, sir. I wanna get my way. Nail you hard to that expensive desk of yours... in your expensive suit... to thank you for all that expensive tuition you paid over the years."

This was new territory for the Weirs. They'd never talked about money, other than some of Steve's jokes about how much Jake's private school cost and some practical dad-son talks about personal finance. But Jake was bringing it into the sex talk and both men were surprisingly turned on by it.

"FUCCK!" Steve cried a half second before choking his reaction to be quieter in his office.

"Go for it, Dad!" the lacrosse jock said more openly. He stepped up closer so he could see his dad's face as he rode out an intense orgasm. "Nice!"

Steve's face was flush red as he caught his breath. "Goddamn, I needed that," he said. Then playfully he tilted his phone down. Huge splotches of his pearly white seed dotted his dress shirt after all.

"Cumming!" Jake cried, unable to hold by his ejaculation now. Steve had to look, had to watch his Jakey in full nut. It was just a beautiful sight. The only thing more beautiful was watching Jake orgasm as he was buried deep inside his father.

"Attaboy, Sport," he encouraged. "Goddamn, that's a huge nut."

Jake grinned as he felt the aftershocks. Playfully, he squeezed out dribbles from his long piece of jock meat and brought it up to his lips to taste. Not his dad's but a second best. Jake just loved the flavor of cum.

He could now tell his father was wiping off the cum from his shirt and his cock before pulling the phone back.

"That was incredible," Steve said.

"I'll say. I'll have to thank Rich for giving me the free time," Jake laughed.

"Is he away?"

Jake nodded. "All weekend. Maybe we can go long and deep this weekend, you know, edge a little."

Steve grinned. "I'll try, Sport.... awful hard to last with you, you know."

"Yeah, I know," Jake agreed.

His Dad seemed happy and yet sad at the same time. "Listen, I should go."

"Yeah," Jake said. "I need some dinner."

"I miss ya, Sport," Steve said. "So much."

"Miss ya too, Dad."

****

Steve felt nervous all Saturday. Jake had suggested they wait till later in the day for phone sex. The father tried to kill time with household chores and a super long session at the gym.

"You're a fucking mess, Steve," he said to himself as he drove home from the fitness center where he'd been spending a lot more time since the divorce and especially since he and Jake started fooling around. It felt wrong to be so attached to his own son, and yet he was.

There was a package on his front porch. FedEx Saturday delivery. Steve picked it up.

"What the fuck?" Steve laughed as he saw his son's dorm as the return address. "That little bugger."

As he opened the door and stepped in, the man squished the sides of the plastic package-envelope. It was soft inside. Steve opened the end with the pull tab.

As he pulled out the fabric, Steve Weir recognized the shorts immediately. They were a well-worn pair of Jake's high school lacrosse shorts. Wadded inside was a worn jock strap.

"Jesus," Steve hissed with excitement. Maybe Jake wanted him to have these for their session today. Or maybe this was just for the times it was Steve, alone in his bedroom, imagining a grown son who wasn't there with him.

Either way, Steve knew both the shorts and the jock were gonna be crusted with his own cum before long.

It was only after a second that he noticed scraps of paper on the floor. They'd fallen out, hand torn.

Steve immediately sensed what they were, and a quick look confirmed it. It was the hall pass he'd sent Jake.

"Man, buddy," he said aloud in the quiet room as he pulled out his phone. He had to call his son.

"Hey Dad"

"Oh, Jakey..." Steve said.

"You got it."

"Yeah, I got it," his dad replied. "You're not doing this just to make me happy are you?"

"Maybe," Jake said. "But not really. I don't know, Dad. I just realized I'd rather have blue balls than fuck a substitute you, you know?"

"Sport, that's the most fucking romantic thing anyone's ever said to me," Steve beamed.

That made his son laugh. "Yeah, that's me, one romantic fucker... just promise me one thing, Dad."

"Anything," Steve said.

"We gotta find away to see each other through the semester. Yeah, I know you want me to go off and be my own man. But I can't wait till Thanksgiving. For real, Dad."

"Yeah, we'll make it happen. I'll come down next week. And fly you up whenever you want. Promise." This was a backpedal from the promises Steve made himself when Jake went off, but he realized he was happy changing his stance.

"Cool. God, Dad, I love you."

"Love you too, Jakey," Steve said. He looked down at the scraps of paper and everything they represented. "And son... next time you're here, I'll let you fuck me on my desk."

#drakestories

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thedroneranger · 1 year ago

Text

The Last Unicorn

Natasha "Phoenix" Trace, Javy "Coyote" Machado

Synopsis: Getting caught between Natasha and Javy leads to a unique experience.

Note: A horribly late entry for @sushiwriterhere's Top Gun Threesomeissance 2023 event—thank you for inviting me to participate! I have a bad bout of writer's block, but forced myself to push through and write this. Took longer than expected, but I wanted to finish it. It's also my first threesome, so I welcome feedback but be kind!

Warnings: 18+ only, smut, ffm, threesome.

Word count: 5.3k

Javy hated when Natasha flirted with other people. Every phone number, every touch pissed him off.

“Hold that glass any tighter, and you’re gonna be wearing your beer.” Jake said as he sat down next to Javy and tracked his best friend’s gaze to Natasha.

She was on the other side of the bar, hand wrapped around a beer pint while a fresh-off-the-carrier ensign made her laugh. Jake never could figure out Javy’s infatuation with Natasha, and he also couldn’t figure out Javy’s refusal to admit he had feelings for her.

Jake had lost count of the number of times Javy had drunkenly told him he and Natasha were purely physical. Every time Jake just nodded his head and drank his beer. Mentally, he would run through the rolodex of moments that said otherwise.

But now Javy and Natasha were in some sort of argument, and not speaking to each other. Not unusual. They would kiss and make up eventually.

Both Jake and Javy were deep in separate thoughts when you approached. “Are you ready for another round?” You asked with a smile. The two men nodded as you walked away to get them fresh beers.

You’d been working at The Hard Deck long enough to recognize Jake and Javy. You knew they were friends with the bar owner, Penny. You also knew Jake could go home with anyone in this bar. Javy, too. While Jake usually took advantage, Javy always left with the same brunette.

Jake and Javy also recognized you. They made half-hearted passes at you only when Penny wasn’t around, and then made sure to make up for it in tips.

You were convinced Penny had threatened them about fraternizing with her staff. It made you chuckle to think that Penny would shake down her customers before her own staff. It also sounded very much like Penny.

Natasha, the brunette Javy usually went home with, either was exempt or just didn’t care. She shamelessly flirted with the bartenders.

You found her attention flattering.

Any man with functioning eyes thought you were attractive. Of course, this meant you put up with a gamut of flirting, catcalls and comments. It was the most exhausting part of your shifts.

However, Natasha’s flirting felt less burdensome. Probably because she was a woman and knew more about how you ticked. Or maybe Natasha wasn’t even flirting with you? How did you know?! Were you being presumptuous? Confusing friendliness for more? After all, other women didn’t flirt with you. Or maybe they did? Maybe they did but were more subtle, and you just didn’t have a clue? You were used to subtle-as-a-neon-sign men.

Sometimes you caught yourself daydreaming. Are women better kissers? Are women truly better lovers? You had had your fair share of subpar romps with men. Are women actually better at li—

Shoot! Javy’s beer overflowed. Focus! You needed to focus. You wiped your hand, snagged a clean glass and poured another beer. Smile back on, you took the fresh pints to Jake and Javy. They thanked you, and you turned to find the next patron in need.

Natasha was staring straight at you. You bit your lip, clenched your fist and headed in her direction. “Hey!” She greeted you while leaning across the bar top.

“Hey!” You echoed, also leaning across the counter so you could hear better.

Jake and Javy watched your exchange. “Goddammit, she gets off on breaking the rules.” Javy grunted.

Jake sniggered as he took a sip of his beer. “I think she’s genuinely into her. She doesn’t hit on any of the other bartenders.” They continued to watch you and Natasha while sipping their beers. You laughed at something Natasha said, and she gently touched your arm. Then you took her empty glass to replenish her drink.

An idea struck Javy. He gulped his beer and pushed the empty glass toward your side of the counter. Always attentive, you noticed and noted to visit him after giving Natasha her pint.

Natasha kept her eye on you as you floated over to Jake and Javy. Both men were so focused on you, they didn’t even notice Natasha glaring at them. She watched as Javy said something that made you laugh.

Then, of course, Jake chimed in. Heaven forbid he not be in the center of attention. She scoffed as she sat her beer on the counter.

Javy was flirting with you, and Jake was wingmanning for him! Natasha couldn’t believe her eyes. Penny was nowhere to be found when Natasha needed her the most. It was calculated. Normally, Natasha was the flirt. She sought out people to piss off Javy.

“What are you up to?” Natasha said under her breath. She practically chugged her beer and flagged you down for another.

All night, you volleyed between Javy and Natasha, refilling their drinks and politely engaging with them. You were completely oblivious to the silent war raging between the pair.

As the night went on, the bar grew busier and Javy and Natasha couldn’t have all your attention. While you were serving some other patrons, Jake sidled up to Natasha and leaned on the bar beside her.

“Bagman.” She spat without looking at him, sticking her face in her pint.

“Bird brain.” He turned and waited for her to react.

She glared at him as she set her drink down. “What’s Javy think he’s doing?”

“Getting under your skin, and I’d say it’s working.” His gaze went from Natasha to you. You were busy pouring a line of shots. “Just remember she’s not a piece of meat.”

Natasha was stunned. “There’s rich coming from you!” She told Jake.

Jake gave her his million-dollar smile and leaned in. “Leave the usin’ and abusin’ to me.” He grabbed his beer, ready to return to his perch on the other side of the bar. “Stop playing with Javy, too.”

“Why don’t you impart that wisdom on your best friend? It takes two!” Natasha shouted as Jake disappeared into the crowd.

By the time Jake settled into his seat beside Javy, Natasha was chatting you up. He knew exactly what you two were chatting about. Based on your body language you hadn’t committed yet.

Both forearms on the counter Natasha leaned toward you. You mirrored her stance so she could speak closer to your ear in the loud bar.

“What time do you get off work?” she asked.

“Bar closes at two, but since I have seniority I can leave first if the crowd dies down,” you explained.

“How about a nightcap at my place?” Natasha followed up.

You were taken aback. You weren’t ready for this moment. “I’ve never been with a woman,” you blurted.

“Same rules apply.” Natasha playfully winked. “No pressure. However, I’d love to have a drink with you, at the very least,” she said in earnest. “And I’d be happy to be your first.” Natasha paused. “Whenever you’re ready.” You both smiled.

“I’ll keep you posted.” You confirmed before parting to serve another patron.

Javy and Jake watched the exchange from their seats. “Looks like you won’t be in her bed tonight.” Jake referred to you.

Without skipping a beat, Javy said, “Nah, all three of us will be in Nat’s bed, instead.”

Jake nearly spit out his beer. He had never heard his best friend be so bold. They looked at each other. “You’re serious aren’t you?”

“As a heart attack.” Javy confirmed. The jukebox queue mellowed and the crowd thinned as Jake probed Javy about his plan. Once he was informed, Jake disappeared to take his pick of the Hard Deck smorgasbord and go home.

Meanwhile, Javy continued to watch you as you ended your shift and accompanied Natasha to the parking lot. He figured he had time for one more beer before joining you.

Until then, Natasha was focused solely on you. The drive to her place was short, but the playful roast over your music choices helped you unwind.

Once parked, Natasha led you by the hand into her apartment. She kept up the banter as she let you choose the wine. Everything felt easy as you nestled together on the couch.

Warm from the wine, you pliantly slipped onto Natasha’s lap. Her hands ran from your knees to your thighs and then rested on your hips as your hands explored her arms and neck.

Finally, you leaned in and pressed your lips to hers. Your hips rolled forward a little, which enticed Natasha to bring her thumbs to the creases of your thighs. Your lips fit perfectly against hers, and you smiled into the kiss when she did.

Your tongue swiped along her bottom lip, and she gladly premised you to deepen the kiss. Natasha met you by curling her fingers to your hair at the base of your skull.

The tension had you moaning into her mouth. You broke the kiss to allow her to press wet kisses down your neck. Eyes shut, you bit your lip as she continued to pepper you with affection.

Preoccupied, you barely noticed as her hands slipped under your shirt and massaged you through your bra. It wasn’t until her fingers dipped past the lined lace and pinched your nipples you acknowledged her. She smirked and repeated her motions to pull more noises from you.

You were a moaning mess, leaning into her touch and rocking your pelvis against hers. Natasha encouraged you with every touch of her lips and caress of her fingers.

Natasha managed to get you out of your shirt and had your jeans unbuttoned, when a sharp knock on the door nearly sent you rocketing through the roof. She tried to keep you going but you were distracted.

As you and Natasha attempted to untangle yourselves so she could answer the door, the knocking grew more rapid. You shooed her away with one final kiss. She kept a smile on her face until she turned to face the door.

Fortunately, you weren’t within sight or earshot. Before answering, Nataha took a deep breath and put on her signature smirk.

“What do you want, Machado?” She leaned on the doorframe as Javy stared at her. He looked casual with his hands in his pockets and the top few undone buttons of his shirt exposing his chest.

“Are you looking for a third?” He asked coolly.

Natasha had to put her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud as she stood straight up. “You can’t be serious?”

He shrugged. “Can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” He stood square to Natasha. “I know you’re game.” Javy reached out and dipped two fingers into Natasha’s front pocket, pulling her toward him.

She stared at him as she took a step closer. “Why were we mad at each other?” she inquired. Her gaze dipped from his eyes to his lips momentarily.

Javy shrugged again. “Can’t say I recall.” He was slowly closing the gap between them.

“Me either,” Natasha said. She could feel Javy’s hot breath in her face. “Apologize, and I’ll let you in.”

He smirked. “Apologize for what? I thought we forgot what we were fighting about?” He stopped moving, awaiting a response.

“I’m convinced you were at fault.” She closed the gap, pushing her lips against his. Natasha cradled Javy’s face as his arms wrapped around her waist.

After a few seconds she pulled away. “It’s her first time with a woman. I don’t want you to ruin it.” She gave him a dangerous look.

Javy couldn’t help but smile. Natasha’s concern for others was one of the endearing things about her. “It might be helpful to have some familiar energy in the mix.”

“Everything is her choice,” Natasha told him.

“Absolutely.” Javy agreed.

“Even you joining.”

“Even me joining.” He agreed.

Unsure of what was taking so long, you’d put your shirt on and buttoned your pants. The wine was too enticing to pass up, so you poured yourself another glass and paged through an old aviation magazine Natasha had laying on the coffee table.

Finally, she reappeared with Javy. “Hi!” You hoped you managed to somewhat mask the surprise in your voice.

“Hey,” Javy replied casually with a bright smile.

“Wine?” You offered as though it were your home. Javy looked at Natasha who gave a slight nod. The three of you sat down, drank wine and bantered. You were tucked between the pair on the couch. Javy’s arm laid along the sofa behind your head, while Natsha’s hand rested on your thigh.

When your glass was empty, you stood up. “What are you doing?” Natasha asked.

“I was thinking I should get going. I don’t want to impose on your evening.”

Natasha passively waved her hand. “If anything, Javy imposed.” She threw him a look. He nervously scratched the back of his head and flashed a cheeky smile in your direction.

“I’d love for you to stay and finish what we started,” Natasha said. “I’d love for both of you to stay, if you’re comfortable with that.”

Your gaze floated to Javy. “It’s your choice,” he said. “I don’t want to impose but I’d love to stay. Participate, even. If you’ll have me.”

“He’s very enthusiastic.” Natasha added as she glanced at him and pat his knee. He grinned.

In your wildest dreams you’d never imagined you’d be propositioned for a threesome. Let alone by a couple. Actually, were they a couple? Before your thoughts could swirl too much, Natasha slid her fingers into your hand and pulled you back onto the couch between them.

She looked at you as she let her knuckles skim up your arms. “What do you say?”

You were looking at her lips. “Do you do this often?” Your gaze came back to meet hers.

She shook head. “This would be the first time.” Her knuckle traced your jaw. “Javy and I only sleep with each other.” Natasha was looking at your lips, leaning closer.

“I haven’t been with anyone recently and am on birth control,” you replied.

Your tongue darted across your lower lip and Natasha’s pulled into a sweet smile. “Perfect.” Your lips finally met.

Her hand found the back of your head and guided you as she deepened the kiss. Soon you were kneeling on the couch cushions with your knees slotted. Natasha rocked herself against your kneecap for some friction, and you mirrored her actions.

A small moan escaped your lips as you caught her knee just right. “Holy, shit,” Natasha mumbled as you continued to make out. She pulled you further up her thigh, so you were closer. Your chests touching and her hand wrapped around your hips. Your hands were loosely splayed over her shoulders.

“Let me take you to bed.” She huffed as she pulled away. Her pupils were dilated with desire. You felt so powerful as you stared at her. Her chest heaved, waiting for your reply.

A groan had her looking past you. You turned to find Javy at the other end of the couch. He had given in and was palming his hard-on. “Do you want some help with that?” you asked. Both he and Natasha looked at you.

Natasha combed her fingers through your hair. “Only if you want to,” she said softly. You looked between her and Javy. He continued to massage his bulge. Silently, you slid from Natasha’s lap, and slipped onto the floor in front of Javy.

While you moved his hand and began to unfasten his pants, he scooted to the edge of the sofa. Together, you slipped his jeans down his legs and tossed them aside. Your palms ran up his thighs as you leaned forward into his lap.

A smile graced your lips as you thought about how Javy’s face wasn’t the only pretty thing about him. Then, you gingerly took his length in one hand, letting your thumb swipe over the tip. Precum slicked the pad. Javy watched as you brought your thumb to your mouth and sucked his essence from it.

His lips quirked at the soft pop! your lips made. A hum rose from your throat as you leaned forward to kiss his abs. Javy’s breath hitched, which made you smile.

You sprinkled kisses across Javy’s abdominals and thighs. Finally, your lips touched his cock. He twitched so hard when you finally kissed his tip, you thought he might instantly cum. Palms planted on the floor, you slipped the head into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it. A light groan escaped Javy.

It was intense, but you held his gaze and you continued to swallow him inch by inch. Your tongue laved along the underside of his cock. You enjoyed the thick pulsing vein, which you softly prodded now and then. The first time, his hips bucked. The second time, you felt his length twitch.

Javy was first to break eye contact. Once he was completely down your throat, he couldn’t help but loll his head against the back of the couch and moan. A smile crept across your features the best it could for having a thick cock stuffed in your mouth.

A hand grazed across your shoulders as Natasha knelt beside you. “Can I touch you?” she asked. You nodded the best you could. Natasha’s hand was in your hair, combing it out of your face. She placed soft kisses on the back of your neck and along your shoulders as she situated herself behind you.

Lips still on your neck, Natasha’s hands reached around to unbutton your pants. Then she dipped a hand in, following the plane of your belly. She smiled against your neck. “No panties. You little minx!” She kissed you more.

“You’re so wet,” she cooed. Her fingers easily slipped through your slick and tugged your clit. You moaned around Javy from her touch. “That’s it.” Natasha’ voice was sultry in your ear. Almost involuntary, your hips began to match her rhythm as she sandwiched your clit between her fingers and slid them back and forth.

You moaned around Javy’s cock again. This time, you gagged a little. “Holy, shit.” Javy’s breath hitched again. “Nat, tell her how good she is.” His voice was strained.

“But baby, do you want her to take you to completion? So soon?” Natasha asked.

“You decide,” he responded in a single breath.

Natasha’s hand disappeared from between your legs. You were disappointed at the loss of stimulation. But her hand soon was tugging your roots, easing you away from Javy. Her other hand replaced your mouth, sliding up and down Javy’s length.

“I didn’t think you could look prettier, but you're gorgeous after sucking his cock.” You felt yourself clench around nothing at her compliment. She also swallowed your whimpers as she covered your mouth with hers.

Once again, you were in Natasha’s lap, grinding against her thigh as she licked into your mouth. She had one hand down the back of your pants, palming your ass while the other was still pumping Javy. You’d managed to get your hands up her shirt and were massaging her through her bra.

“Fuck!” You broke apart as Javy sprung off the couch. He hauled you up by the elbow, and Natasha quickly followed. You stumbled and Natasha helped steady you with a hand on your hip as Javy led the three of you to what you assumed was Natasha’s bedroom.

He let his hand slide down your arm until your hand was in his. “Can I kiss you?” He asked, pulling you until you were tucked to his chest. You’d been looking at his lips the whole time and met his gaze, giving him a small nod. His kiss was softer than Nat’s. Javy’s palm came to rest on your cheek. When you parted, he let his thumb glide across your bottom lip.

Natasha stepped behind you and slid a hand back into your unfastened pants. Her chin rested on your shoulder. You looked back at her and turned to face her. She smiled and kissed you before walking you backward toward the bed. You let yourself fall onto the mattress when your knees hit the edge. Natasha helped you shimmy out of your pants.

Before you could move, she was on her knees between yours, placing kisses on your inner thighs. She held your gaze as she slipped one of your legs over her shoulder, and pushed the other back for better access. “Relax,” she said between kisses. You watched her. Your heart seemed like it might pound right out of your chest onto the floor.

She held your gaze as she placed the lightest kiss on your cleft. Then, her tongue dipped between your folds. You exhaled with pleasure as her broad tongue glided the length of your clit and then narrowed into your hole. Her free hand found yours and entwined your fingers as she tongued you.

You couldn’t help the moans escaping you. You also couldn’t keep your back on the bed. Only Natasha’s hand was keeping you grounded as you writhed above her.

Unnoticed, Javy made his way over to the bed. He shed his clothing and slid beside you. You turned to look at him. He placed a sweet kiss on your forehead, then your nose and finally pressed his lips to yours. Again, his hand found yours. He and Natasha both supported you as you moaned and arched your back off the bed. That delicious tension was building low in your stomach. You wanted Natasha to get you there so bad.

“Javy,” Your breathing was ragged. “Put your cock in my mouth.” There was a pause. “Please.” He let out a light laugh as he maneuvered to cradle your head and slip himself into your mouth. You moaned as his tip stretched your cheek. Languidly, he continued to thrust into your mouth sometimes hitting your cheek and sometimes the back of your throat.

Javy and Natasha fell into complementary rhythms. “C’mon, come for me,” she coaxed you. She switched to two fingers pumping in and out of you, making sure to hit that spongy spot each time. You felt your vision fading as your orgasm grew nearer.

Finally, you tumbled over the edge with Javy’s cock filling your mouth, Natsha’s fingers stuffed in your pussy and her mouth sucking your clit. It felt like your whole body came off the bed as you writhed and moaned. Javy and Natasha held your hands through it all.

As you came back to your senses, you heard them praising you. You were laying between the pair as their fingers softly skimmed your curves. You felt flush as you looked at Natasha. “That was amazing.” She smiled in response. “Maybe the best orgasm I’ve ever had.”

“Nat definitely knows a thing or two,” Javy added. You turned to look at him. He had the proudest grin.

Natasha’s soft laugh drew your attention back to her. “Javy’s no slouch.” It was cute to hear them talk up each other.

“Can I try to repay the favor?” you asked.

“Gladly.” Natasha smirked and leaned in to kiss you. Before it got too heated, she broke it to ditch her clothing. Quickly, she returned to you, palming your breasts and rolling your nipples until they hardened.

Curious, you dropped your mouth to her nipple and swirled your tongue around it until it peaked. You showed the other the same attention and then alternated between sucking on each. Natasha arched into your affection. Her hand tangled in your hair as you pleasured her.

Javy watched you two before slipping off the bed. He reached for you and dipped his hands into the hinges of your thighs to position you on your knees at the end of the bed. You moaned and released Natasha with a smack. Before Javy pulled you away, you placed a kiss on each pert nipple. Natasha followed you, nestling her hips into your arms, so you could wrap your arms around her legs and easily bury your face in her pussy.

Javy lined himself up behind you, sliding him length between your cheeks, and then he slid his tip through your puffy, soaked folds. He grunted, letting his pelvis hit your ass.

You canted forward slightly, bumping your nose into Natasha. She softly chuckled as you gasped. The tip of your nose was now wet. She looked at you and then dropped her gaze to herself. Your eyes followed to see her middle and index fingers spreading her lips. “Oh!” You watched as her fingers slid down her clit and disappeared inside her.

She and Javy exchanged looks above you as he pushed himself into you. A gasp escaped you as Javy slowly sank into you. You spread your knees wider enjoying his thickness. He kneaded your ass as he let you adjust to him.

“Doesn’t he feel amazing?” Nat asked as she continued to pump her fingers in and out of herself. “Javy, is her pussy amazing?”

“Yeah, baby. So tight. So warm.” As he found a pace he liked, one hand moved to your clit. The other found purchase on the bed as he leaned over you to kiss Natasha. She happily sat forward to press her mouth to his.

“Oh. My. God.” You said with each thrust. Javy continued to draw tight circles on your clit. Fists filled with bedding, you braced yourself the best you could. You were still bumping into Natasha occasionally.

Finally she pulled away from Javy and got back in her initial position. “I can’t wait any longer, can you please put your pretty mouth on my pussy?”

“Will you tell me what to do?” you asked innocently. She moaned, turned on by your naivety.

“Of course.” She winked at you.

As you lowered your head, Javy thrust just right to hit your G spot. Your breath hitched and a curt moan left you. Attentive, he repeated his actions and you rewarded him with more moans.

Natasha couldn’t stand it anymore, she laced her fingers in your trusses and guided your lips to her heat. “Stick your tongue out. Flat.” You did as you were told and Natasha ground her slit against it.

She sighed and continued stimulating herself on you. Enjoying the sensations at both ends, you felt the tension in your belly building again.

“Suck me.” Natasha let go of your hair and guided you until your mouth was on her. Without hesitation, you pressed your lips flush to her clit and sucked. She tossed her head back as you applied more suction.

Instinctually, you slid two fingers into her hole. She gasped and began to roll her hips in tandem with your fingers pumping in and out. You loved the silky feeling of her on your fingers.

Resting your mouth, you pressed the pad of your thumb to Natasha’s clit. You never had your fingers in a pussy other than your own. Wanting to please Natasha, and curious, you changed your angle with each probe. Finally, you found that rubbery patch on her upper wall.

Her breath hitched and she squeezed around your fingers. You zeroed in, come-hithering your digits against that spot and putting your mouth on her.

“You’re a natural.” She moaned as she put her hand on the back of your head and pressed herself against your face. You hummed against her pussy, and she clenched her thighs around your head.

Javy helped hold Natasha’s thighs wide. Still buried between your legs, Javy leaned over top of you and placed a hand on each of her kneecaps. You alternated between sucking on her clit and dipping your tongue into her while he held her open.

“Keep doing it,” Natasha whined, closing her eyes and biting her lip. Suddenly, her eyes shot open. “I want to ride your face. Javy, flip her over,” she commanded.

No time to react, you yelped as Javy easily rolled you on your back. He slipped back into your pussy and moved at a listless pace. His hands traversed your hips and belly.

Meanwhile, Natasha demanded you stick out your tongue as she straddled your head while facing Javy. Immediately, she began to slide back and forth against your broad tongue. “Yes! Yes!” she chanted. You could tell she was close to her peak. To help push her closer, Javy put his month over one of her nipples and palmed the other. Your hands moved to grope her ass and spread her wider.

Nat stopped moving, and you and Javy took over. You laved your tongue all over her, sucking her lips, nipping her clit and planting kisses here and there. Natasha gasped when you began to tongue fuck her. She moaned and bounced a little against your face, which was the final piece to her twitching against your mouth.

You continued spreading Natasha and plunging your tongue into her heat. The task proved difficult when Javy guided Natasha’s head between the two of you. She stroked your clit with her tongue and fingers. Meanwhile, Javy began to pick his pace back up, thrusting into you.

The tension in your stomach tightened, and you were on the verge of overstimulated. Your head lolled back on the bed and your back arched as your second orgasm washed over you. Natasha and Javy worked you through it.

About to cum himself, Javy said, “Look at me,” to Natasha. She stared at him with doe eyes as he pulled out of you. A few pumps of his fist, and warm viscous ropes glazed Nat’s face. She gasped as the last drops hit her skin. Javy helped her climb off you, and he encouraged you to clean her up.

She knelt beside you on the bed, palms planted. You swiped two fingers across her bottom lip, before pushing them into her mouth. She licked them cleaned, and then sucked them before giving you your hand back. You then cleaned the rest of her face with your tongue.

Natasha pulled you on top of her and lured you into a makeout session. While the two of you kissed until your lips were numb, Javy snuck away.

He returned just as you separated. He cleaned you up with warm damp washcloths and planted a kiss on each of you when he was done. He also brought you water with electrolytes. Then, he tossed two of his t-shirts at you while he pulled on boxers.

The three of you climbed into bed, he and Natasha on either side of you. Natasha rested her head on your chest and lazily drew circles on your thigh under the sheets while you were tucked into Javy’s side. He pressed kisses to your temple every now and then, and his fingers played with Natasha’s hair.

You were nearly asleep when Natasha pressed a couple kisses to your jaw. You moaned. “I don’t think I can do another round tonight.”

“But you want another round? Or two?” Natasha’s tone was hopeful. Your heart fluttered at the thought. Tonight was easily the best sex you had ever had. Why wouldn’t you want to do it again?

Javy’s hand rubbed your shoulder and bicep. “I can speak for both of us when I say we’d love another round. Many rounds.” He kissed your forehead.

“Let’s sleep on it and discuss over breakfast,” Natasha suggested as she settled back into her spot with her head on your chest. “Javy’s a unicorn in the kitchen.” The three of you giggled before exchanging goodnight kisses and nodding off to sleep.

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#top gun threesomeissance 2023 #natasha trace #natasha x reader #top gun maverick #top gun #tgm #coyote top gun #javy coyote machado #javy machado x reader #natasha phoenix trace

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scotts-takes · 11 months ago

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"Black Out See Saw" is the Climax Alkaloid Deserved

Top Songs from Enstars 2023 Number 1

I was blown away when the album art for Alkaloid was released a few months ago...

This art is such a sharp contrast from their first album art, that shows how they have grown. The basic military style unit outfits have been replaced with regal commander-style ones. The basic emotions that are shown in the original are now much more refined- in particular, Aira has evolved from someone simply happy to be on a stage to someone who is confident in his place on it, Mayoi is putting himself more in center, and Hiiro's confident smirk has become more stoic, as he now has the experience to go with his skills.

All of this went away, however, when we actually got the Alkaloid Climax song...

Sigh...it was the seasonal Halloween event for the year. Yes, the idea of incorporating hospital/illness and Tatsumi's relationship with it is an interesting story to tell...but Alkaloid deserved so much more, especially as the "Protagonists" for the !! era of Enstars. I was frustrated that the end of this era of Enstars for Alkaloid was wasted on a seasonal event, but was at least able to take solice in that Alkaloid gets 200 chapters of the main story dedicated to them, and we still had solo songs for each character to come from the album. December rolls around, and the album releases. After jumping through hoops to buy it, I throw my headphones on to give the album a listen. The first track, "DiZZineSS" is a weird 30 second preamble with no singing, not something I was expecting. However, it rolls directly into the first new song on the album

Bam

Black Out Sea Saw is a violent wall of sound, unlike anything else that has been done for Enstars before, and I can understand fans not liking it. The reason it sounds so different is because it was produced by TK of Ling Tosite Sigure, a 20+ year going Prog Rock group. I listened to the song 3 times before moving on, and waited for the MV release to come, as is usual with the "B" side track from Albums. And what we got was one of the most well constructed videos for Alkaloid fans, and the climax that I was looking for that wasn't provided by the Halloween song.

The video opens...strangly, especially if you haven't heard the song before. The opening is intentionally choppy and rough, almost like it was an unfinished song that still needed production. There is a weird reverb effect happening- which you can especially hear when Mayoi hits the high note, that led to a friend saying "it sounds like they recorded this in a bathroom or something". The other thing that really jumps out is how robotic and synchronized the movements of all 4 members are. This is a BIG deal. In just about every Alkaloid video, you can find little inconsistencies at various points- Aira is sometimes a bit slow to do something, Hiiro is sometimes a bit too fast, Tatsumi's movements are less athletic, etc. The robotic movements are all in perfect unison, especially at points where characters do things together, like make hand bridges. It's a sign of Alkaloid's growth as a unit- they started as a collection of rejects, and now they haver come together and become a great unit together.

As we go to the first chorus, the intensity of the song ramps up- it becomes FAST, yet every member is in perfect harmony. The dancing becomes more intense- and everyone stays perfect. And then we get to the final line "It's Error-Error", and things start to change- we start to see more finger movement, the motions become more flowing and less robotic (the robots are malfunctioning! error! error!), and more personality is shown by each member.

We then get a wonderful effect of feathers raining from the sky, before, and then we get to see everyone smile, including Hiiro with this soft and expressive look. (that I wish I was able to time slightly better when I took my screenshot!)

Why is this important? Lets take a look at the first Introduction of Hiiro, in his first close-up in Kiss of Life

It's a look of focus, of determination, and NOT one of joy. Hiiro NEVER smiles at any point in Kiss of Life except during the SPP- he maintains a focused look the entire time. Additionally, you can look at just about any Alkaloid video, and Hiiro rarely smiles- if anything, he just physically assaults the camera in every one of them! The final chapter of the main story is titled "Smile", which is a discussion between Hiiro and Rinne on what it means to be an idol, and Rinne telling Hiiro "Whenever I see you smile, it makes me smile too", with Hiiro responding that he will do whatever it takes to make people smile

Hiiro wasn't able to smile in Kiss of Life, as his focus was on putting smiles on the faces of others. It's weird, because when he isn't preforming, a smile is basically plastered on his face permanently. He has a very loud and infectious laugh, and he's just happy to be doing anything at any time. On stage, for him, its different. And Black Out Sea Saw is the first time that Hiiro is able to not just smile, but show kindness in it, as opposed to simple joy or excitement. It's a MASSIVE step forward for him- the kind of thing that, you know, you might build a Climax story around?

And then, we come to the end, where the intensity of the song does not let up, before it all crashes to an end as the lights go dark and Alkaloid go still

To me, this is the Alkaloid Climax, the song that I will remember. They have gone from a group thrown together to a cohesive unit with a sound unlike anyone else in the franchise, and all of whom have had character growth. It's the one that they deserve going into the new era that is upcoming, and even has a level of finality to it, seeing as how it was released right at the end of the year.

Alkaloid deserved better than Undying Holy Love, and boy, did they get it...

#ensemble stars #alkaloid #hiiro amagi #tatsumi kazehaya #aira shiratori #mayoi ayase #black out sea saw #mv analysis #Enstars Climax #Best of 2023

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wanderlust-in-my-soul · 11 months ago

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Hi Josi 😊 For the Top 5 BL: Best Hug and / or Most Beloved Sidecouples ✨

Uuhhhh, two in one! Maxine, thank you for this ask ❤

I love a good hug. Seeing those feels like I get a hug (and sometimes it makes me feel really single). There are the hugs that you can feel through your screen, some of them you just want to look away, because this moment belongs only to the couple on screen, they are just so intimate and there are so ones where one wants to crawl into the other one and I am here for this kind of hug. This desperate need for each others closeness.

The start makes the oldest one on this list:

My School President

Their hugs just felt so good! I loved giffing those moments. They needed the other one physical close, they felt peace in those hugs and it was their way to show how much they cared for each other. I loved every single one of those hugs!

I just realised the next ones are all just some really desperate hugs... and I love them! I have a thing for them...

Kiseki: Dear To Me

This hug felt so good. Finally they were reunited again. Finally they could hold each other again. And damn this was such a beautiful hug! They hugged with their whole body and soul. Imagine holding the love of your life finally in your arms again after years of spending apart. I love it!

Tokyo In April Is...

There is no space for anything else between them. Kazuma made sure of that. He neeeded Ren to feel this hug, and for himself to feel this closeness again. Both are in love with each other, even though they couldn't tell each other yet, but for us viewers it was cristal clear. This hug alone made it clear for us. I love this hug so much!

Pit Babe

Yes Babe, cry because you're so happy to have Charlie back in your arms! Beautiful. I needed this, he needed this and Charlie needed this too! We all needed this! And I love Pavel's facial expressions in this moment.

I Feel You Linger I The Air

The most desperate hug after the most saddest fuck this year! Such a beautiful scene! They knew they didn't have much time left and just made love. They wanted and needed to feel every inch of each other, and it felt so intimate, I had the urge to look away and let them have this time alone in closeness and happiness and desperation.

And now after these beautiful scenes we go on to my favorite side couples 2023. I love a good side couple I can concentrate on and forget about the main couple 😅

The first couple is one of the most precious ones of this year. We knew them and we knew they had incredibly chemistry and could act really nice, but nevertheless they blew us away:

Heart and LiMing from Moonlight Chicken

Their story was so wholesome and important. Their journey was so good. LiMing's struggles with his mum and his uncle, the money and the fact that he wanted to see the world were so ordinary and felt so real it was so good. And Heart's problems with his parents and the urge to be more independent and to be seen felt so sad and Gemini was so good. Oh I love these two and their stories!

Next we have a show I didn't like that much, but I was in love with the side couple. They were the only reason why I kept up with this show.

Zeke and Fifth from My Story

They had an extreme intense chemistry. I loved them on screen and their journey to finally become a couple. I was hyped for their own show and was so let down. I couldn't watch it. It was too much cringe for me, but this is just personal preference. In My Story I adored them and this scene especially.

Next is the couple, that has the most entries in all of my Top 5s this year:

AiDi and ChenYi from Kiseki: Dear To Me

I love them. They stole the show and my heart. Their dynamic is so adorable after they finally become a thing. In the beginning I was a little put off. I didn't understand their relationship, but within a few episodes this changed I was rooting for them so much! I was so happy when ChenYi finally understood his feelings for AiDi and AiDi finally got what he wanted desperatley for years!

I don't know if the next one counts... The show has three couples and I guess one was the main couple. Well, I cared more about the other ones.

Love Class 2

Maru and Minwoo had the softest kiss this year in my opinion and Sungmin and Joohyuk had this lap-situation and everything else that came after. I really enjoyed their stories and their characters. The main couple was just not that interesting for me. But because of the side couples (or the other main couples) I enjoyed this series so much!

I close this list with a couple, that is a little bit problematic for me. I don't like the series that much, mostly because of the main couple and the bad writing for them. But the writing for this side couple was so much worse!

Jaab and Jane from Step By Step

I was so pissed with their ending! What was that? There was no real conclusion and I still don't know if they are happy together now. They had this huge cheating plot (and I like those tropes, but only with a good solution in the end) and before they could work on that Jane was never seen again. This was so sturpid, I was so angry. I wanted them to have their own stupid happily ever after, but no, we have some creepy stalker like behavior and some mystery... no thank you, but besides that I liked them so much and I wanted so much more of them!

Ask me Top 5 BL Anything from 2023

#asked #bl game #ask game #anything bl 2023 #bl drama #bl series #thank you so much for this ask 💙#josi answers #my school president #kiseki: dear to me #tokyo in april is...#pit babe the series #i feel you linger in the air #moonlight chicken #my story #love class 2 #step by step

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chiibi-chaan · 1 year ago

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- Kinktober 2023 - Masterlist -

- Pairing. - Bokuto Kotaro, Haikyuu.

- Warnings. - I'm so late lmao sorry, +18 (MDNI), drunk!Bokuto and tipsy!reader, slightly jealous!Bokuto, love-struck!Bokuto, oral (sixty-nine), not proofread.

The sky was already dark when Bokuto and you stepped through the door of your shared house, a little tipsy after drinking with old friends from high school. Bokuto couldn’t stop giggling, his low tolerance being the cause of his behaviour, even though he only drank some cans of beer.

It was hard not to laugh with him, he looked so happy, his arm draped over your shoulder and his body bumping against yours with each step he took. He wasn’t even able to walk straight, and you were not too far from being in the same state as him, because Kuroo, Bokuto’s best friend, was quite eager to make both of you drink until you ended up in this poor state.

You dragged Bokuto to your shared bedroom and let him fall on the bed, gasping as he pulled you down with him. You both looked at each other before bursting into laughter, tears forming in your eyes from laughing so much. After calming down a little, Bokuto wrapped his arm around you and smiled, his fingers slowly stroking your arm up and down. He looked at you with such warmth, such affection, that it had your heart melting with equal love. "You’re so pretty…" He mumbled, his eyes focusing on your face and taking in the sight of you, your face feeling warmer due to the alcohol, your disheveled hair and your smile… Such a pretty smile, it made him fall in love all over again.

"You know… Sometimes I realise how lucky I am… so lucky… ‘cause I’m yours… and you love me… only me…" He murmured, his voice a little raspy as he talked slowly. The alcohol running through his veins made him sleepy, but he blinked his drowsiness away and pulled you closer against him. "Why are you so pretty… I don’t like it… other guys keep looking… mmh… mine…" He rambled and pressed kisses against your face, before biting your cheek gently, making you laugh slightly.

He continued babbling nonsense, his hands gripping your hips and massaging the soft flesh while he held you closer. But after a few seconds he became quiet, staring at you silently and biting his lip. "Hey…" He murmured, his hands moving to your ass and gripping it gently. "Hey, sweetheart." You cooed softly, your fingers tracing his jawline as you looked at him with a tender gaze. "Mmh… wanna sit on my face?" He said bluntly, making you eyes widen and your eyebrows raise in surprise. "What?"

"Yeah… wanna taste your sweet little pussy…" He mumbled and licked his lips, laying on his back and staring at you with glazed eyes. You sighed and removed your pants and underwear, struggling a little as you slid them down your legs. He whined softly at the sight of your half naked body, his fingers hitching to touch you and his mouth watering. You ran a hand through your hair and went on top of him, your knees digging into the mattress on each side of his head. His hands immediately reached for your hips and he pulled you down, breathing deeply and groaning at the smell of you.

He parted your folds with his tongue, circling your clitoris and pushing inside you. His hands held your hips firmly, steadying you as he began to pleasure you. You moaned and your back arched slightly, small gasps falling from your lips and your fingers grasping his shirt while he groaned against your core.

"Fuck, yes... you taste so good, baby..." he murmured, his voice muffled as his tongue worked faster, lapping up your juices before he suckled on your swollen clit. You wined and your hips bucked, your gaze falling down to his erection straining his pants. He moved his hips unconsciously, his hands moving to hold your thighs as he continued eating you out. You felt dizzy, pleasure clouding your mind more than the alcohol in your blood. Your fingers fought a little with the button of his pants before pulling them down along with his boxers, freeing his aching cock. He groaned again, his voice vibrating against your cunt as he bucked his hips, his body aching for you to touch him too.

You wrapped your hand around his shaft, pumping him a few time before leaning forward and sucking him into your mouth. Bokuto whined, his eyes rolling back and his nails digging into your thighs as he pulled you down harder against his face. he was messy, but he couldn't help it, you tasted so good, so good he thought that he could cum just from tasting you. It would be so embarrassing, coming undone from just having you sitting on his face, but he wouldn't feel even an ounce of shame, not when he had you like this, not when you let him relish in the taste of your sweetness. It was addicting, you were addicting, and he couldn't help but want more.

You moaned and rocked your hips, grinding against his face while sucking him off, feeling him mumbling dirty words of praise against your flesh. He growled, the sound rumbling in his throat as his tongue lavished attention on your sensitive clit, drawing shuddering moans from you. One of his hands gripped your hair, pushing your head down and making you take more of his length into your mouth, his hips bucking up at the same time. "Fuck, you're amazing," he breathed, his voice rough with desire and his tongue darting out to taste more of you. His sounds were muffled by your folds, his eyes rolling back as deep groans and quiet whines fell from his lips, his thick shaft pulsing in your mouth. He was close, you could tell, his hand gripped your hair tighter and his hips jerked forward erratically, beads of precum coating your tongue. His hands gripped your buttocks, kneading the flesh as he suckled on your clit again, not caring about how sloppy he was while eating you out, your juices coating his cheeks and chin. With a few more hard suctions on your clit, he had you coming undone on his face, your moans becoming high pitched and your breath coming out in muffled gasps. It took him a few more thrusts into your mouth to reach his own climax, his cock throbbing as thick ropes of cum spurted on your tongue, beads of his seed dribbling down your chin.

You panted and rolled on the bed next to him, still trembling with the aftershocks of your orgasm. Bokuto mumbled your name, his hands pulling you against him. "'m sleepy..." he murmured quietly, nuzzling his face in your neck and holding you tightly against his chest, his strong arms firmly wrapped around your waist. You smiled softly and kissed his temple, your fingers running through his hair. Soon, you felt his breathing slowing down and he started to snore softly, fast asleep in your arms, where he belonged.

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